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COPYRIGHT DEPOSIT 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

BY 

ELIZABETH MYERS 




NEW YORK 

BRENTANO'S 

MCMXVIII 






<3*' 



Copyright, iqiS 
By Brentanos 



JUL 17 1918 



THE UNIVERSITY PRESS, CAMBRIDGE, U. S. A. 



^■CI.A499760 



> 






PREFACE 

THIS book is written not in the belief that 
the information contained therein is un- 
familiar to the majority of its readers, but with 
the knowledge that, in our scurrying along to 
keep up with time, we have neglected the epis- 
tolary pen and resorted to means more rapid 
to express our thoughts. In the capsule forms 
of telegram, cable and other means, the art of 
graceful expression must necessarily be thrown 
in the discard. 

Letter-writing to-day is a lost art. We have 
no modern Madame de Sevigne to stand im- 
mortal through her gift of correspondence. We 
no longer embroider with pretty words. The 
cavalier of the pen lies moldering in his frills 
and satin knee-breeches. 

Yet now and again we are faced with a task 
that demands the taking up of our pen upon 
some social occasion. Immediately what should 
be a joy becomes a bugbear. It remains to be 
done, however, for courtesy and good-breeding 
stand inexorable sentinels. We know well 

[ v ] 



PREFACE 

enough what it is we should say, but just how 
to say it, makes us pause and question. 

I have, therefore, endeavored to place a few 
stepping-stones in the rushing river of social 
obligations; not only for those who need merely 
a gentle reminder to speed them on, but for the 
debutante, suddenly- confronted with the de- 
mands that must come with her entrance into 
the social world. 

If I have accomplished this I shall feel that 
my efforts have not been in vain. 

The Author. 



[ vi ] 



CONTENTS 



CHAPTER I — INTRODUCTION 

Jr AGE 

Function of social letter I 

Brevity 2 

Simplicity of form and language 3 

Forms 3 

Formal notes 3 

Informal notes 5 

Forms of address 5 

In closing 6 

Ending the letter 7 

Abbreviation , 8 

Stationery etiquette 9 

The letter-sheet 10 

Envelopes 10 

Monograms — crests 11 

Addressing and dating 12 

The opening paragraph 14 

Punctuation 14 

Appearance of letter 15 

Chirography 15 

Addressing envelope 15 

Elimination of the ego 18 

Psychological effect of letter . ........ 19 

Answering a letter . 20 

The note with a message 20 

Don'ts 21 

[ vii ] 



CONTENTS 

CHAPTER II — THE INVITATION PAGE 

When to answer an invitation 23 

The definite reply 23 

To whom to address invitation ....... 24 

To whom to address reply 25 

For club invitation 25 

Visiting card 26 

Engraved invitation 26 

Afternoon affairs 26 

Invitation through daughter 26 

Leaving visiting cards 27 

Details to be considered 27 



DINNERS 

Invitations, formal 28 

Invitations, formal, engraved 28 

Acceptance, formal 29 

Regret, formal 29 

Special purpose invitation 30 

Special purpose acceptance 31 

Special purpose regret 31 

Invitation for place other than home .... 32 

Acceptance 32 

Regret 32 

Informal invitation 33 

Informal acceptance 33 

Informal regret 33 

Daughter of house, invitation 34 

Daughter of house, acceptance 34 

Daughter of house, regret 34 

Including opera, etc 35 

Including opera, etc., acceptance 36 

Including opera, etc., regret 36 

[ viii ] 



PAGE 



CONTENTS 

LUNCHEONS 

Formal invitation "to meet," etc 37 

Formal invitation "to meet," etc., acceptance 37 

Formal invitation "to meet," etc., regret ... 38 

Informal invitation 38 

Informal acceptance 39 

Informal regret 39 

Informal theatre, opera, party, etc 39 

Informal theatre, opera, etc., acceptance ... 40 

Informal theatre, opera, etc., regret 40 

WEDDINGS 

Formal invitation 41 

Formal invitation, engraved 42 

Home wedding 44 

Wedding breakfast 44 

Acceptance, formal 45 

Regret, formal 46 

Informal wedding 46 

Informal wedding invitation 46 

Informal wedding acceptance 47 

Informal wedding regret 47 

Wedding announcements 47 

Announcements 48 

Second marriage . . . 48 

Recalling invitations 49 

BALLS 

Invitation 50 

Acceptance 51 

Regret 52 

Informal dance 52 

Visiting card invitation 53 

Acceptance, informal 53 

Regret, informal 54 

[ ix ] 



CONTENTS 

RECEPTIONS — AT HOMES page 

Acceptance 55 

Regret 55 



CLUBS AND SOCIETIES 

Invitation 39 

Acceptance 57 

Regret 57 



GARDEN PARTIES 

House or week-end parties ......... 41 

Invitations 59 

Acceptance 60 

Regret 61 

"Bread-and-butter letter" 61 

Reminder 63 

Canceling invitation 65 

Formal 65 

Informal 65 

Breaking an engagement 66 

Invitation to "shower" 67 

Acceptance 67 

Regret 67 



CHILDREN'S PARTIES 

Invitation 68 

Acceptance 69 

Regret 69 

Invitation to stranger 48 

Request 7° 

Acceptance 7° 

Regret 7° 

[ x] 



CONTENTS 

CHAPTER III — THE LETTER OF THANKS page 

The cheerful receiver . . < 72 

Bride's note for wedding gift . 72 

Acknowledgment 73 

CHRISTMAS GIFTS 

From employee to employer j6 

To acquaintance J J 

To benefactor 78 

BIRTHDAY LETTER 79 

WEDDING ANNIVERSARIES 80 

On fifth year 81 

For a longer period 81 

FOR FAVOR RECEIVED 82 

GIFT TO BABY 83 

Acknowledging gift for child 84 

CHAPTER IV — THE LETTER OF CONGRATU- 
LATION 

Letter to engaged girl 86 

Man to engaged friend 87 

For honorary distinction 88 

Birthday letter 89 

From man to girl on birthday 90 

On wedding anniversary 90 

Upon recovery from an illness 91 

CHAPTER V — THE LETTER OF CONDOLENCE 

Stationery 95 

Acknowledgment, formal card 95 

Acknowledgment, informal 96 

[ xi ] 



CONTENTS 

Letter upon death of close relative 
Letter upon death of distant relative 

Letter upon death of friend 

On material loss — loss of animal (pet) 
On soldier lost in battle 



PAGE 

98 
100 
100 
100 
101 



CHAPTER VI — CLUB CORRESPONDENCE 

Accepting membership 103 

Refusal of application for membership .... 105 

Resignation, from club 107 

Resignation, formal 107 

Resignation, informal 107 

Introducing friend for membership 108 

Of thanks for this favor 109 

Extending hospitality of club no 

Reply, extending hospitality of club in 

Letter of condolence upon death of a member 112 

Letter of condolence, formal 113 

Letter of condolence, informal 113 

CHAPTER VII — MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Bon voyage letter 114 

Bon voyage letter — addressing envelope . . 114 

Bon voyage note 114 

Letter of welcome 115 

Letter to serving class 117 

Formal note 117 

Informal note 118 

Letter of recommendation 118 

For excellent recommendation 119 

Letter requesting information 120 

Reply giving information 121 

Information — office work 122 

Recommendation . 122 

Derogatory 123 

[ xii ] 



CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Letter of introduction 123 

Visiting card, introduction 126 

Begging letter for charity 126 

Begging letter for charity — reply affirmative 128 

Begging letter for charity — refusal 128 

To act as patron or patroness 129 

To act as patron or patroness — acceptance . . 131 

To act as patron or patroness — refusal ... 132 

The child's letter 132 

Of thanks 133 

On a birthday 134 

French mode of addressing and closing letters 134 

In addressing 134 

Concluding a letter 135 

Forms for concluding 135 

CHAPTER VIII — MODE OF ADDRESS 

For women 138 

Two women with same name 138 

Divorced woman 138 

Business signature 139 

Husband's official title 139 

Title for wife 140 

Unmarried women 140 

Men 140 

Jr. and Sr 140 

Official titles 141 

Officers Army and Navy 141 

War Office 142 

Foreign legation 142 

CHART 

Titular persons 143 



[ xiii ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



CHAPTER I 
INTRODUCTION 

A WISE man once said: " Never put in 
writing what you would not care to see 
printed in the newspaper." 

This is a valuable rule to tack up in front of 
our desk to start with, and, while this little book 
aims to give points on the purely social side of 
letter-writing, the nature of which somewhat, if 
not entirely, precludes any danger of having our 
pen run away with us, this admonition is not 
altogether uncalled for here. 

The social letter, in the strict sense of the Function 
word, differs widely from the friendly letter in °f ™*f 
that it is written for a distinct social purpose; j etter 
for, or in response to, a purely social occasion. 
The friendly letter, on the other hand, is our 
proxy for a little tete-a-tete, telling of the per- 
sonal news of the day and should be as extem- 
poraneous as daily speech. Such letters, over 

1 1 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

and above the demands of education and good- 
breeding, are given free scope and it would be 
as footless to dictate rules as it would to commit 
a monologue to memory prior to a friendly 
visit. 

But for the social notes there are certain pre- 

/ scribed forms. We knit our brows and shake 
puzzled heads at the mere thought of having to 
write them. What must we say — just about 
how much? Mrs. Grundy is at our elbow, and 
the knowledge of her presence muzzles our 
spontaneity and we resort to a somewhat 
stereotyped form which, we feel sure, will pass 
Brevity muster. We do not wish to commit ourselves 
unduly, therefore, first and foremost let us re- 
member that a social letter should always be 
brief. As Hamlet has it : 

"Since brevity is the soul of wit 
And tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes 
I will be brief." 

To-day, of all times, we are a busy people with 
every moment precious, therefore just put our- 
selves in the position of a prospective hostess 
with her thousand-and-one duties; the replies 
to her invitations come pouring in. For her, 
at this particular time, the one interest is, not 
the reason why, so much as the direct knowledge 

[ 2 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

as to whether she may or may not be able to 
count us among her guests. The brief advice 
is, having said our say, stop. ^ 

Simplicity both in form and words is un- Simplicity 
affected and graceful. Flowery language, ex- of Form 
travagant expressions, effusiveness are, for the j 
most part, effervescent, and lack the reserve 
and dignity that are the passwords to good- 
breeding. " Trimmings" are so often only 
pathetic in their strained and obvious efforts to 
hide deficiencies. A letter filled with amenities 
is like so much suds, and contains as little of the 
real essence, so that the recipient, after wading 
through the sea of words, says to himself, "and 
after all — what?" 

Oh, the joy of receiving a short note written 
to the point, aptly and ably expressed, free from 
all redundancy! 

The social letter admits of two forms: the Forms 
formal and the informal. 

The formal is as prescribed and conventional Formal 
as a gentleman's dress suit, and should be as Notes 
immaculate in conformation. It is used only for 
invitations, announcements and replies thereto. 
In the formal note the third person is always 
used, and consistency, or rather uniformity, is 
strictly adhered to. For instance, we would not 
say: 

[ 3 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Mrs. Blank Dash 

regrets that / am unable to accept 

Mrs. Blank's 

kind invitation for dinner 

on Wednesday, March the ninth, 

as / have a previous engagement for that 

evening. 

In the second and last lines Mrs. Dash lapsed 
from the third person into the first in naming 
herself, thus throwing the whole out of gear. A 
good suggestion to bear in mind is to imagine 
that another person is writing for you, and 
therefore you would naturally say: 

Mrs. Blank Dash 

regrets that she is unable to accept 

Mrs. Blank's 

kind invitation for dinner 

on Wednesday, March the ninth, 

as she has a previous engagement for that 

evening. 

A formal note always demands an answer in 
kind. Among intimate friends a word or so of 
greeting may be added to "take off the chill," 
as, "do try to come," etc., but it is not to 
be denied that this is taking liberties with 
social usage. 

The third-person note should always be 

[ 4 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

thought out with regard to wording and spac- 
ing. As a general rule, date and hour are always 
spelled out, not written numerically. 

One side of the note-paper should hold all the 
text. For the most part the correspondence 
card is eschewed, perhaps for the reason that it 
presents a less elegant appearance than the 
double sheet folded once. But in the case 
where engraved invitations are used the card 
is resorted to. The stamped address or mono- 
gram is never used on engraved invitations, but 
where there is a coat of arms or crest, these may 
be used in the center, small and embossed, to 
lend distinction. 

For these, no cut-and-dried formula can be Informal 
given, except in a general way. Notes 

The informal note holds place with the tuxedo 
coat, as the formal note does with the swallow- 
tail. 

Never, and this is most important, never Forms of 
address a person in a purely social note as Address 
"Dear Madam," or "Dear Sir." Remember 
that the social note must have all the features 
of a few moments' chat in the drawing-room, 
and so Mrs. Dash is entitled to the use of her 
name upon greeting, to show the entente cordiale. 
Upon no other occasion, except one of business, 
should "Dear Madam," etc., appear. 

[ 5 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

In America "my dear" is considered more 
formal than just "dear" — the reverse, how- 
ever, is the case in England. 
In Closing It is a fact that ninety-nine times out of a 
hundred we get along swimmingly when writing 
the body of the letter, but with the closing 
sentence comes the rub. How to break away 
gracefully. We do not wish to do this too 
abruptly, any more than upon meeting a friend 
should we leave him without a word or so of 
well-wishing. An awkward sentence in closing 
has so often marred what would have been 
otherwise a good letter, and the unfortunate 
part of it is that those pesky stumbling words 
stick in the memory and offset the rest of the 
epistle. 

Therefore, let us always try to make a 
graceful exit, with no awkward stumbling and 
strained expression, but with a smile and cordial 
handshake that will linger refreshingly in the 
memory like pleasant incense long after we have 
turned the corner. 

It would be well in a measure to copy the 
punctilious French with their inherent good 
/\ manners. Always 'in writing a charming little 

closing phrase is added, as (to translate liter- 
ally), "Receive, I pray you, my sentiments 
the best and most sincere," or such like. So 

[ 6 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

also should we add a word or so for "fragrance," 
as, " trusting that these few words find you and 
your family in the best of health," or "I hope 
the near future will give me the pleasure of see- 
ing you again," etc. 

The rigid rules we learned and conned so 
diligently with regard to the school-day letter 
writing have, for the most part, been consigned 
to oblivion. Just as our chirography changes 
in character as we get on in years, so our 
thoughts mature and get away from the copy- 
book style. We come down to a few general 
rules that we have found held good through 
time, and we make them our own. 

We can never write better than we think. 

Endings vary in degrees of warmth and are Ending the 
used according to the light in which the re- Letter 
cipient is held. The table given here indicates 
the order to be followed : 



Yours truly 
Yours very truly 
Yours respectfully 
Yours very respectfully j 

Yours sincerely 
Yours very sincerely 
Yours most sincerely 
Yours cordially 

[ 7 ] 



Used only in business 
letters 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Yours in all cordiality 
Yours most cordially 
Warmly yours 
Yours in all sincerity 
Yours faithfully 
Yours very faithfully 

Yours gratefully When a favor has been granted 

Yours affectionately 
Very affectionately yours 
Yours lovingly 
Very lovingly yours 

The position of the pronoun " yours" is op- 
tional. If the preference is to have it at the 
last, as, "very cordially yours," it is quite cor- 
rect, but one point to remember in this small 
but important matter of endings is, that 
to omit the pronoun yours is exceedingly bad 
form, as, "very truly" or "sincerely," etc., 
aside from the fact that the phrase is left 
unfinished. 
Abbrevia- Just a few words upon this matter: Never 
tions abbreviate. At first sight this seems a pretty 
general and broad statement to make, but if 
followed literally we may be sure that if we err, 
it will be on the right side. 

The word and is always entitled to its full three 
letters and never the sign y. With the words 

[ 8 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

street, place, avenue, square, park, etc., the same 
holds good, as with the name of the month; any- 
thing short of the full spelling is distinctly bad and 
shows carelessness in social correspondence. 

Speaking by and large, we are known by the Stationery 
stationery we use, for here the individual comes Etiquette 
tc the fore. Good or bad taste may be apparent 
in tone of paper or design. There is as much 
psychology in the study of this matter as in the 
selection of the clothes we wear. In those who 
affect the ultra, the color and design cry it aloud. 
In what category would you place the woman 
who is partial to deep purple paper and white 
ink! It has been used. Sufficient to say that 
the outre is offensive to good taste; such as start- 
ling colors, the fads of the seasons, — the queer, 
absurd shapes in form of letter-paper and en- 
velope. Let us, who wish above all to stand 
for refinement and good-breeding, neither be 
like a flock of senseless sheep in matters of selec- 
tion, accepting the very latest cri, for no other 
reason except that of fashion, nor seek to at- 
tract attention by daring originality. It is hard 
to say which is the worse fault. 

A quiet tone, if white be not chosen, — a 
monogram that in its very simplicity contains 
a certain amount of individuality, the subtle 
something that at first glance pleases the eye 

[ 9 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

by its quiet elegance, are the things to aim for. 
Fashions differ from season to season in sta- 
tionery and its appurtenances much as in the 
varying vogue in clothes. But in this, as in our 
dress, the exaggerated styles are shunned by the 
person of refinement. To be conspicuous is 
never his aim. 

Many keep to one mode of stationery and 
stamping irrespective of changing styles. Their 
note-paper becomes as familiar to their friends 
as their physiognomy. 
The Letter- There are, generally speaking, three distinct 
Sheet s i zes i n letter-paper. The largest sheet, which 
is about five by six and one-half inches, is used 
for general correspondence, its generous size 
allowing for a lengthy epistle. Then comes the 
slightly smaller size for short social notes. This 
must not be too small, for we must remember 
that in formal notes the full text must appear 
on the front page only. And lastly, there is the 
smallest of all; just of sufficient size to allow for 
a few words of congratulation or condolence on 
its four sides, or less. 
Envelopes The envelopes are for the most part either 
square or oblong; the latter have ever been 
the more popular, the square-shaped, however, 
have a large place for those who aim for 
distinction. 

[ 10 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

It were well to take into consideration the Mono- 
fact that this is an age for simplicity in form. g rar ^ s 
Take, for instance, architecture, furniture, dress. Crests 
Where are the frills of yesteryear? What has 
become of the Moorish decorations, the col- 
umnar and arcaded, the arabesque and the 
profusion of meaningless ornamentation that 
stood for rococo? They have disappeared to 
give place to simple beauty of line. To-day the 
art of decoration lies not so much in what to 
add as in what to eliminate. 

So it is with our letter-paper. Let us avoid 
overdressing. Originality can always be the 
keynote, but simplicity in style must go hand 
in hand. Just as in a tailored suit; the finer the 
lines the better the tailor. A simple design in 
monograms needs more the master-hand than 
one surrounded by curly-cues and flourishes. 

The place for the stamping is optional. Since 
we have agreed that stuffiness is tabooed, the 
monogram by itself or the address alone pre- 
sents a better appearance than both together, 
for one seems to detract from the other. In the 
placing of the monogram, the center of the 
paper or the left-hand side is generally used. In 
the case of the address, it is the center of the 
paper or the right-hand side. But where there 
is a country house, the directions are sometimes 

t ii i 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

set in very small letters along the upper left- 
hand margin, and the name of the house or 
town at the right, as: 



TELEPHONE, 748 VALLEY VIEW 

TELEGRAPH, BREWSTER ..„._, 

R. R. STATION, BREWSTER, N. Y. CARMhL, N. Y. 

POST OFFICE, CARMEL 



This is done so that friends coming to visit 
may know clearly the directions. 

Many persons have the fourth page stamped 
instead of the first, thus making the first the 
last. It has been found convenient, for in that 
way the two outer sheets are used in sequence 
as are the two inner. This does away with the 
first and third, second and fourth order, which 
has been found in many cases to be confusing. 
This form of using the sheet presents a very 
neat appearance. 
Addressing After having experimented and found just 
and Dating w hat pleases us most, it would be well to 
make a set of rules in the matter of form. 
Once having mastered them, there should be 
no further thought as to what must be done 
under this or that condition. This is not only 
time-saving but mind-saving. To many, this 

[ 12 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

attention to details may seem trifling, but a 
wiser person than the author has said, that "it 
is the little things that count." 

The most commonly used form for writing the 
address and date is at the upper right-hand 
side of the paper. This is, of course, granting 
that the address is not stamped, but should 
it be, the date placed at the end of the 
letter at the lower left-hand side is better for 
conformity, so as to obviate any writing at the 
top of the sheet where the stamping appears as: 

(Stamped) 29 Riverdale Place, 

Yonkers, New York. 

Heading 

Body of letter 

Closing 

Signature 

Date 

Then, again, we find very often that on un- 
stamped paper the writer leaves both the ad- 
dress and date until after the signature. This 
can be satisfactorily explained, for many con- 
tend that, especially where the recipient is not 
[ 13 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

well acquainted with the writer, the name, 
date and address may be seen altogether at 
one glance. 

It is rather nice to see the date and address 

spelled out in social notes. A good rule to follow 

in this matter is to spell out both address and 

date if both happen to be short, as, Twenty-five 

West Fourth Street. But when one spells out 

the date, it would be better to write, March the 

sixth, or March sixth, and omit the year, for if 

we wish to add the year we should not add it 

numerically and spelling it out would make it 

too " heavy." If the year is to be added, it were 

better to write it: March 6, igi8. Even in so 

small a matter, consistency must be held to, 

were this not so it would show plainly we were 

not at ease with social usages. 

The In the editorial office of a magazine the re- 

Opening jection of a manuscript many times lies in the 

aragrap ^ ct xh&t the first page presents too " thick" an 

appearance. The long and heavily worded 

opening paragraph has prevented more than 

one reader from wading through it to what 

might have proved to be a most interesting 

story. This also applies to letter-writing. Short 

sentences are always safer than long ones and 

Punctua- make clearer reading. Profuse punctuation or 

tlon conjunctions do not always help us through a 

[ 14 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

forest of dense wording and are apt to get us 
very involved as to just what we mean to say. 

Always leave a margin of at least three- Appear- ' 
fourths of an inch in large sheets and one-half ance of 
in smaller at the left-hand side, and a slightly Letter 
smaller one at the right-hand side. This gives the 
letter the appearance of being set in a frame. 

It is not always the man of genius whose Chirog- 
handwriting is the despair of his friends; illegi- raphy 
bility is often due to haste, carelessness and 1/ 
thoughtlessness and may cause our letters to 
be received with anything but the cordiality we 
had hoped for, since the deciphering makes for 
a painful ordeal. The tendency is to run our 
ing's until they are nothing but a jagged line with 
a little tail. We forget to dot our i's so that 
they get mistaken for another character, as is 
the case with fs that remain uncrossed. 

Slurred writing is counterpart to mumbling 
speech. 

Some textbooks have it that in social notes Addressing 
the number of the street, if it contains not more Envelopes 
than two figures, should be spelled out. The 
argument in refutation is: Consider the poor 
postman! Think of the thousands of letters 
he must handle and whose addresses he has to 
decipher daily. A week of such a rule as sug- 
gested above would send the poor man to a 

[ 15 1 



\ 






THE SOCIAL LETTER 

sanitarium to recuperate from a bad attack of 
brain fever! 

, Remember that the envelope is the wrapping 
paper, — it must present explicit directions. 
Therefore it is necessary to make the name and 
address as clear and concise as it is possible to 
do. Never be afraid to give too full instruc- 
tions, for the dead-letter office may receive 
your letter if "you don't watch out." 

In the case of addressing an envelope to a 
person residing in New York City, it were 
always wiser to write, New York City, New York. 
This will preclude any chance of its going astray 
were it written merely New York, and at least 
gives the writer the satisfaction of knowing 
that he has done all that he can to insure his 
letter arriving at its proper destination. 

If the address is very brief, as, Thirty West 
Fourth Street, or 600 Fifth Avenue, the number 
of the house may be written numerically and 
the number of the street or avenue spelled. 

The word "for" written before the name is a 
fad that is not indulged in by the "best people," 
as: 

For 

Mrs. Blank Dash 

besides the fact of its being entirely unnecessary. 

[ 16 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

In the matter of writing the name of the 
state without abbreviation, the answer is, that 
if it should happen to be very long it is right 
to abbreviate if one wishes, but if short, like 
Maine, it must never be abbreviated. The 
usual form of addressing envelopes is: 

Mrs. Blank Dash, 

14. Courtlandt Place, 

Trenton, 
New Jersey 
or: 

Mrs. Blank Dash, 
14 Courtlandt Place, 
Trenton, 
New Jersey 

The first is the more popular, though the last 
is newer and sometimes effected. 

The postage stamp should be put on care- 
fully in the upper right-hand corner of the en- 
velope. The "slapped-on" effect that teeters 
on one angle makes as poor an appearance to 
the ensemble of the envelope as a carelessly tied 
cravat on an immaculate collar. Again, con- 
sistency in care and thought results in a splendid 
whole. 

If the letter is to be forwarded, a notation in 
small writing may be added in the lower left- 

[ 17 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

hand corner, as, "// not at given address kindly 
forward" or just the words, "Kindly {or please) 
forward." 

The words personal or important should not 
be added if the letter be sent by mail. Only in 
the case where it is delivered by hand may they 
be used. We trust Uncle Sam's men to see that 
our letter reaches its destination on schedule 
time, — not so, always, with private employees. 
Elimina- Do not let us forget that correspondence is 
tion of the blood-relation to the personal visit. For in- 
£° stance, if a guest entered our home we would, 
I am sure, put his interest foremost in our con- 
versation, at least until he had told us all he 
wished to say on the subject. Had he been in 
ill health, in stress of worry, we would inquire 
how he was getting along. If, in his family, there 
had been illness, we would be solicitous ; then, only 
when that topic had been exhausted, would we 
intrude our own affairs. We always offer our 
guest the best chair, while we content ourselves 
for the time being with the straight-backed, 
spindle-legged one. So it is in writing letters. 
Never, if we can avoid it, must we bring the 
personal in starting our letter. That does not 
mean that we may not start our letter with the 
pronoun "I," as we were taught not to do in 
days gone by, but if we do use it, let us make the 
[ 18 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

"I" subservient to the "you" and "your." 
The first person pronoun staring at us at the 
beginning of every paragraph is not only poor 
writing but creates a poor effect; having the 
interest of the recipient at heart carries almost 
invariably a feeling of warmth and brings in 
return a more cordial response. 

There is much to say with regard to the Psychologi- 
psychological effect on receipt of a letter. Let ca j Eff ect 
us always be'ar in mind the type of person to 
whom we are writing. Letter-writing is an art 
and should be treated as such. 

Sometimes the lightest touch, a mere hint, 
is all that should be sent to John, while Henry, 
being a totally different sort of a fellow, needs 
to have your thoughts baldly and plainly put. 
There is the analytical person — he reads be- 
tween the lines — |a sentence left in abeyance 
causes suspicion! Look out when writing to 
such an one. iJricle George is a crotchety old 
man; under his gruff exterior he hides a heart 
of gold. He is indeed well worth humoring; 
don't tread on his toes. Aunt Matilda, on the 
other hand, is garrulous and especially wishes 
you to dilate upon her latest trouble. Without 
hypocrisy, do so, since you are pleasing her at 
no cost to others. 

In other words, we should take into con- 

[ 19 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

sideration the peculiarities and foibles of the 

person to whom we are writing. In all social 

intercourse there is inevitably the "rebound;" 

let us take care that it is not such as will come 

up with force and strike us in the face. 

Answering How many of us really answer a letter? That 

a Letter ; s to sa y ? we ma y wr ite to Mrs. Dash because 

Mrs. Dash wrote to us, but do we make our 

replies dovetail? It is a wise plan always to 

keep the letter to be answered until we have 

done so, reading it over just prior to sitting down 

to the task and so, having the contents well in 

mind, we can reply to questions asked, inquire 

after the welfare of someone or make mention 

^\ of certain conditions referred to. 

The Note Ofttimes we say to ourselves: "I wonder 

z^A a whether this needs an answer?" The solution 

* to that remark is: When in doubt — answer. 

The mere fact that a question arose in our mind 

is sufficient reason to warrant the taking up of 

our pen. 

It is not by any means the long, effusive letter 
that contains a message. In sorrow or joy a 
few words written from the heart may linger, 
much as the sincere clasp of a hand, while a 
collection of words may ring as hollow as an 
empty barrel, and further, if saturated with 
banalities, leave a sickish feeling. One cannot 
[ 20 ] 



INTRODUCTION 

always write deep from the heart to certain 
persons. If that be the case, then let us write 
as little as we dare. Sitting down to a duty 
letter in rebellious mood is death to endeavor, 
for strive as we may, the strain of writing will 
show. So, let us try to get ourselves into the 
right frame of mind and seek to write the kind 
of a letter we ourselves would wish to receive 
were the circumstances reversed. It is an in- 
exorable maxim that we receive in such measure 
as we give. Mere pretty words are like flowers 
without fragrance, and this lack of "perfume" 
is as quickly detected. 

Never use business paper for a social note DonHs 

Never typewrite a social note 

Never abbreviate in a social note 

Never begin with Dear Madam or Dear Sir 

Never underscore words 

Never use postscripts 

Never use the sign Jf for number 

The examples of notes that appear in the follow- 
ing chapters are, in the case of formal notes, 
absolute types of how such notes should be 
worded, spaced, and punctuated. Several dif- 
ferent forms are shown in some cases and are 
given in their order of popularity. But, in the 
informal notes, where form and language should 

[ 21 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

be unstilted, the examples of such are given 
merely to suggest a trend or sequence of thought. 
They should not be copied verbatim, for this 
would tend to shackle the mind of the writer, 
and all originality of thought would be lost. 
They are but building materials, and should 
so be used. 



[ 22 ] 



A 



CHAPTER II 

THE INVITATION 

N invitation, no matter how informal, When to 
should always be acknowledged within Answer^ an 
a week of its receipt. This acknowledgment, nm a wn 
whether acceptance or refusal, should be made 
definite ', for any doubtful expression, such as: 
"I hope to be able to come if — ," or "If I re- 
turn to town in time I shall be most pleased — ," The 
etc., leaves the hostess-elect very much at sea; Definite 
in what state of mind would she be if eight e ^ ^ 
out of ten responses contained such a clause? 
Our answer, therefore, must be made a posi- 
tive acceptance or regret, and we must abide by 
our decision. There are times when the hostess 
is so very desirous of having us on a particular 
occasion, that she, herself, gives us the oppor- 
tunity in a loop-hole clause. Then, we may 
give the conditional answer. 

As was said in the preceding chapter, an in- 
vitation must always be answered in kind. 
The formal reply for the formal invitation, the 
wording to follow very closely that of the invi- 
tation. While the informal invitation should 
[ 23 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

receive a reply in the first person, the wording 
of which must cover only the matter in hand, 
it should be free from all stilted phrasing and 
have a pleasing cordiality in tone. 
To Whom Where there are husband and wife, neither 
to Address one nor -j-]^ other should be omitted in an even- 
tions m S i nv itation, unless it be a "one sex" club 
affair or "stag." Where there is also a daughter 
to be invited, she may be included in the word- 
ing of the invitation; where two daughters, a 
separate invitation should be sent to "The 
Misses Blank." But, on the other hand, in- 
vitations sent to the men of the family, other 
than the husband, should be mailed separately 
to each member. 

The full name of the writer, whether issuing 
invitation or replying, should be used, while 
only the last name should be written to the one 
to whom we are writing as, in invitation: 

Mr. and Mrs. John Monroe Smith 

request the pleasure of 

Mr. and Mrs. Hooper's, etc. 

while, in reply: 

Mr. and Mrs. Harold Dwight Hooper 

regret (or accept) 

Mr. and Mrs. Smith's, etc. 

[ 24 ] 



THE INVITATION 

When an invitation is sent to Mr. and Mrs. To Whom 

Blank, the acknowledgment must be made in *° Address 

. . . Reply 

both names, and if the daughter is included, her 

name must also be added. If Mr. and Mrs. 
Dash send an invitation, the acknowledgment 
must be made to both, but the envelope must be 
addressed to Mrs. Dash only. For, while hus- 
band and wife act together in the social func- 
tion itself, the wife is the active manager in 
getting up the affair. 

If the invitation be sent to a man, he should 
acknowledge it personally, but when sent to 
husband and wife, the latter should answer 
for both. 

Where husband and wife are both invited 
and the husband is unable to attend, the wife 
should send regrets for both, but if she wishes 
to state that "Owing to Mr. Dash's absence 
from town," etc., the hostess can ask Airs. 
Dash alone, if she wishes, who may accept 
without her husband. 

If the invitation is made out: "The Board of For Club 

Managers of the Club request the pleasure," Invitations 

etc., the answer must be given with the same 
wording as appears on the invitation and sent 
to the person in charge whose name is generally 
written on the lower left-hand corner with 
personal address. Where no such information 
[ 25 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

is given, the reply must be made out to the 
said board of managers, etc., and sent to the 
club address. 
Visiting Never acknowledge an invitation of any kind 
Card on a visiting card, even though a visiting card 
is used in invitation. (See receptions, garden 
parties, at homes.) 
The In large, formal social functions, the in- 
Engraved vitations are always engraved. These very 
formal invitations should be sent out two or 
three weeks in advance by mail or messenger. 
This gives the prospective hostess time to 
fill in, in case of regrets. It is always a good 
plan to have a long reserve list for such con- 
tingencies. 
Afternoon Invitations for afternoon affairs, such as 
Affairs a t homes and garden parties, are issued in 
the name of the hostess alone, or, if she 
has a daughter or daughters in society, they 
may be included, but not the men of the 
house. 
Invitation A young girl does not send invitations to 
through men i n her own name, but in that of her mother, 
aug er ^ person under whose guardianship or chap- 
Girl eronage she happens to be. So she would say, 
that her mother, her aunt, Mrs. Dash, etc. 
(as case may be), desires her to extend the 
invitation, etc. 

[ 26 ] 



THE INVITATION 

Without wishing to infringe into social cus- Leaving 
toms other than letter etiquette, there must Cards 
be a word said in regard to the leaving of cards 
in response to invitations sent. It has so long 
been a debatable question as to just when to 
leave cards, that there has, at last, been an ac- 
cepted rule made for those who wish to be 
considered punctilious in these matters. 

If unable to accept an invitation, a card 
should be left at the home of the hostess just 
prior to the date of the invitation. If accepted, 
not later than two weeks after the affair is 
given. 

When a bachelor gives a dinner, the women 
invited never leave cards at his home or 
club. 

In replying to invitations, always be explicit Details 
as to day of week, date and hour set, copying t0 be _ 
each from the invitation itself. Then, if by Considered 
any chance the hostess has made an error, she 
will note it by your quoting her in your reply. 
It thus avoids most awkward and embarrass- 
ing situations for both parties, such as coming 
on the wrong day or at the wrong hour. But 
when answering in " regret," the hour need 
not be mentioned, for the very obvious rea- 
son that if you are unable to come on this date 
the time set is of no importance. 
[ 27 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



In sending invitations and replies the date 
of writing may or may not be added. In the 
following examples the dates are omitted. 

Where invitations are not engraved and the 
paper is stamped with address, the address added 
in the following is to be ignored. 
Dinners As the dinner invitation is the highest form 
of courtesy, it will be given precedence of all 
others in the following examples : 



Invitation 
Formal 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE OF 

Mr. and Mrs. Blank's 

COMPANY AT DINNER 

ON THURSDAY. FEBRUARY THE SIXTH 
AT EIGHT O'CLOCK 



433 NORTH AVENUE 



Invitation 
Formal 

Engraved 

Form with 

Blank for 

Name 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE OF 




COMPANY AT 




at nc.mcK 
433 NORTH AVENUE 



[ 28 ] 



THE INVITATION 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank Acceptance 

accept with pleasure Formal 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 
kind invitation for dinner 
on Thursday, February the sixth 
at eight o'clock 
65 West Drive 

or: 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

have much pleasure in accepting 

the very kind invitation of 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash 

for dinner on Thursday, February the sixth 

at eight o'clock 
65 West Drive 

In writing regrets it is always more cour- R e g re t 
teous to give the reason for inability to accept, Formal 
but this is not always done. 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

regret that a previous engagement 

prevents their accepting 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation for dinner 

on Thursday, February the sixth 

65 West Drive 

[ 29 ] 



Invitation 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

or: 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

regret exceedingly that they 

are unable to accept 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation for dinner 

on Thursday », February the sixth 

65 West Drive 

Special When an invitation is given for a special 
Purpose p Ur p 0se as f or instance, to meet a friend from 
out of town, a debutante, an engaged couple, a 
person of distinction, or a Committee or Board 
of Directors of some society, this fact is placed, 
in the case of engraved invitation cards, in 
the upper right-hand corner of the invitation, 
as, "to meet Miss Doe," or "to meet Miss 
Blank and Mr. Dash," etc. If the invitation 
is written, this information is incorporated in 
the body as : 

Mr. and Mrs. Blank Dash 

request the pleasure of 

Mr. Coifs 

company at dinner 

on Tuesday ■, January the first 

at eight o'clock 

to meet General and Mrs Lucius Ring 

433 North Avenue 

1 30 ] 



THE INVITATION 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank Special 

. 7 , Purpose 

accept with pleasure Reply 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's Acceptance 

kind invitation for dinner 

on Thursday, January the twelfth 

at eight o'clock 

to meet General and Mrs. Lucius Ring 

65 West Drive 

In all invitations from clubs, societies, etc., 
the full title is given, as shown below. 

Mr. Thomas Colt Special 

regrets that absence from town R 1 */* 

prevents his accepting Regret 

Mr. and Mrs. Blank's 
kind invitation for dinner 
on Tuesday, January the first, 
to meet the Board of Directors of 
the National Bounty Society 
5643 Main Street 

If the dinner is given in a place other than 
the home, the fact must be noted in the body 
of the invitation as : 

[ 3i ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Invitation Mr. and Mrs. Blank Dash 

when held request the pleasure of 

other than Mrs ' and Miss Bl ™k's 

Home company at dinner 

at Sherry 9 s 
on Thursday, March the twentieth 
at half past seven o'clock 
65 Northern Avenue 

Acceptance Mrs. Dash Blank and Miss Blank 

accept with much pleasure 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

very kind invitation for dinner 

at Sherry's 

on Thursday, March the twentieth 

at half past seven o'clock 

70 Marlborough Road 

Regret Mrs. Dash Blank and Miss Blank 

regret exceedingly that they 

are unable to accept 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

very kind invitation for dinner 

at Sherry's 

on Thursday, March the twentieth, 

owing to a previous engagement 

to dine with Mr. and Mrs. Trowbridge 

70 Marlborough Road 

[ 32 ] 



THE INVITATION 

The informal invitation is always sent by The 
the wife for her husband and self, to the Informal 
wife, including the latter's husband in the 
invitation. 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

Will you and Mr. Dash give us the pleasure 
of your company at a small dinner on Thurs- 
day, October the sixth, at half past seven 
o'clock? 

Trusting that we may have you with us, I 
remain, 

Yours very sincerely, 

Helen Doe Blank. 

Note that the wife always signs herself by 
her Christian, maiden and married name, or by 
using only the initial for the maiden name. 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

Both Mr. Dash and I will be very glad to Informal 
dine with you and Mr. Blank on Thursday, Acceptance 
October the sixth, at half past seven o'clock. 
With cordial greetings, I am, 

Very sincerely yours, 

Edith T. Dash. 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

Unfortunately Mr. Dash and I have a pre- Informal 
vious engagement for dinner on Tuesday, Regret 
October sixth. We are so very sorry not to be 

[ 33 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

able to accept your kind invitation for that 
evening. 

With kind regards, believe me, 

Yours cordially, 

Emily P. Dash. 

Daughter When the daughter of the house is hostess in 
of House j^j. father's home, she always issues the invi- 
tation including his name as : 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

Father wishes me to say that he would be so 
pleased to have you and Mr. Blank dine with 
us on Monday, April the tenth, at quarter past 
seven o'clock. 

Hoping very much that you have no other 
engagement for that evening, I am, 

Yours most sincerely, 

Evelyn S. Andrews. 

My dear Miss Andrews, 
Acceptance We are most pleased to accept your father's 
kind invitation to dine with you on Monday, 
April the tenth, at quarter past seven o'clock. 
With cordial greetings to you both, I remain, 
Yours very sincerely, 
Margaret Grey Blank. 

My dear Miss Andrews, 
Regret It is with much regret that I write to say 
that a previous engagement for dinner on Mon- 
day, April the tenth, prevents our accepting 

[ 34 1 



THE INVITATION 

your father's most kind invitation for that eve- 
ning. Will you kindly convey our thanks for 
thinking of us? 

With kind regards, I am, 

Very sincerely yours, 

Edith James Doe. 

Invitations for dinners and luncheons often Including 
include concert, opera, lecture, matinee or Opera, etc. 
theatre. This is sometimes added, in case of 
formal invitations, at the end as: 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE OF 

Mr. and Mrs. Blank's 

COMPANY AT DINNER 

On Wednesday, March the fourth 
At half past seven o'clock 

And afterward for the play {or opera, etc.) 



56 BROAD VIEW AVENUE 



or: 



Mr. and Mrs. Blank Dash 

request the pleasure of 

Mr. and Mrs. Blank's 

company for dinner and opera 

on Friday, March the thirteenth 

at quarter past seven o'clock 

[ 35 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Acceptance Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

accept with much pleasure 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation for dinner 

on Wednesday, March the fourth 

at half past seven o'clock 

and afterward for the play 

65 West Drive 

Regret Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

regret that they are 

unable to accept 

the kind invitation of 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash 

for dinner and opera 

on Friday , March the fourth, 

owing to a previous engagement 

65 West Drive 

LUNCHEONS 

Luncheon invitations, while for the most 

part less formal than those for dinners, 

follow them in wording. They are issued 

only in the name of the hostess, except when 

[ 36 ] 



THE INVITATION 

men are invited. Therefore, the following ex- 
amples will give not only the form, but will 
also embody the different special occasions, so 
that the reader will become familiar with all 
kinds. 



To meet Miss Edith Howe 
MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUESTS THE PLEASURE OF 

Miss Doe's 

COMPANY AT LUNCHEON 

on Wednesday, November the fourth 
at half past one o'clock 

and afterward to the matinee 



654 WEST 65TH STREET 



Miss Doe 

accepts with pleasure 

Mrs. Dash's 

very kind invitation for luncheon 

on Wednesday, November the fourth 

at half past one o'clock 

to meet Miss Howe and to go 

afterward to the matinee 

78 N. Tremont Street 

[ 37 ] 



Formal 
Invitation 
"to meet" 
and to the 
Matinee 



Reply 
Acceptance 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Formal Miss Doe 

regrets that a previous engagement 

prevents her from accepting 

Mrs. Dash's 

very kind invitation for luncheon 

on Wednesday, November the fourth 

to meet Miss Howe 

and to go afterward to the matinee 

78 N. Tremont Street 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 
Informal Will you and Edith come to luncheon on 
Invitation Tuesday, May the sixth, at half past one o'clock? 
Mrs. John Doe and her daughter Amy will be 
here and I should so like to have you both 
meet them. 

Hoping to hear that you have no previous 
engagement for that day, I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Ethel York Blank. 



My dear Mrs. Dash, 

Will you lunch with me most informally on 
Thursday, the sixth of March, at half past one 
o'clock? 

Hoping so much that you can, I am, 
Yours cordially, 

Ethel Y. Blank. 

[ 38 ] 



THE INVITATION - 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

Both Edith and I will be most glad to come Informal 
to you for luncheon on Tuesday, May the sixth, Acceptance 
at half past one o'clock. It will give us great 
pleasure to meet your friend and her daughter, 
of whom we have heard such charming reports. 
Thank you so much for thinking of us. 
Yours very sincerely, 

Marion Blank Dash. 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

It is with great regret that I must decline Informal 
your very kind invitation for luncheon on Regret 
Thursday, the sixth of March, to meet the 
Board of Directors of the Clodine Club, as I 
am having a little luncheon at home on that 
day for my young daughter. 

With cordial good wishes, I am, 
Sincerely yours, 

Mary V. Dash. 

These are always sent in letter form as, for Informal 
the most part, such entertainments are in- f or Theatre^ 
formal affairs. ^nZrt, or 

tv t i at- t^ Party 

My dear Miss Doe, 

We are planning a little party of eight to go 
to the play on Wednesday evening next, with 
supper at home after, and would be delighted 
to be able to count you among our guests. 

We are to meet in the lobby of the Singer 
Theatre at quarter past eight o'clock. Do 

[ 39 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

try to come and thus help us make our little 
outing a success. 

With cordial good greetings, believe me, 
Yours most sincerely, 

Marion S. Blank. 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 
Acceptance It is so kind of you to include me in your 
theatre party for Wednesday evening next. 
Indeed, I shall be delighted to come and will be 
in the lobby of the Singer Theatre at the ap- 
pointed time, quarter past eight o'clock. 

With kindest regards, and looking forward to 
being with you, I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Esther H. Doe. 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 
Regret It is with great reluctance that I send you 
this note of regret in answer to your most kind 
invitation for the play on Wednesday evening, 
March the sixth. I am expecting a friend from 
the South to spend the week with me, and so 
will not be free that evening. 

Appreciating your kindness in asking me, I 
am, 

Sincerely yours, 

Josephine Grew Trout. 



[ 40 ] 



THE INVITATION 



WEDDINGS 



Formal wedding invitations should always Weddings 
be engraved. They are issued in the name of formal 
the bride's parents, or, if the bride is an or- 
phan, in the names of a married brother and his 
wife; should the bride be an only child, the 
nearest relative or guardian would have to 
officiate in such a case. 

In the church wedding the invitation reads, . 
"requests the honour of your presence" 
(note that " honour" is spelled the English way 
with the "u"), while the home wedding has a 
slightly varied wording, viz.: "requests the 
pleasure of your company." 

The guest's name is written upon both in- 
vitation, reception or breakfast card, the inner 
envelope unsealed, and the outer addressed and 
stamped. The church and reception cards are 
enclosed with the wedding invitation. At home 
cards of a bridal couple may be sent separately 
after the wedding. 

The wedding invitation is addressed to Mr. 
and Mrs. Dash. It is not correct to add and 
family, but to the unmarried daughters an 
invitation is sent to The Misses, and a separate 
one to each of the sons invited. 

Acquaintances are invited only to the wed- 

[ 41 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



ding ceremony; friends receive the reception 
card also. 



Invitation 
Engraved 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE HONOUR OF 

(name written in) 



PRESENCE AT THE MARRIAGE OF THEIR DAUGHTER 

JANET HELEN 

AND 

MR. JOHN WILLIAM DOE 

ON THE EVENING OF MONDAY, THE TENTH OF MARCH 

AT SIX O'CLOCK 

AT THE NORTH END PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH 

BEDFORD PARK, NEW YORK CITY 



or: 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE HONOUR OF YOUR PRESENCE AT 
THE MARRIAGE OF THEIR DAUGHTER 

JANET HELEN 

AND 

MR. JOHN WILLIAM DOE 

ON MONDAY, MARCH THE TENTH 

AT SIX O'CLOCK 

AT THE NORTH END PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH, 

BEDFORD PARK, NEW YORK CITY 



[ 42 ] 



THE INVITATION 

In a large church wedding, the engraved 
admission card reads: 



PLEASE PRESENT THIS CARD 

AT THE NORTH END PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH 
ON MONDAY, TENTH OF MARCH 



The church wedding invitation needs no 
written acknowledgment, except in rare cases 
where R. S. V. P. is added in the lower left- 
hand corner. But for a home wedding an 
answer is generally requested, owing to limited 
accommodations. The reply, whether in ac- 
ceptance or regret, as in all formal invitations, 
must follow the wording of the one received, 
even as to date and place. If unable to attend 
a wedding where no reply is necessary, a 
card should be sent to the parents or guar- 
dian of the bride to be received the day of the 
wedding. 

These invitations should be sent out two or 
three weeks before the wedding. If there is a 
crest it may be used, embossed at the heading 

[ 43 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



of the invitation. This does not apply to other 
than coat of arms or crests. 



Invitation 

Home 

Wedding 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE OF 

(name to be written in) 



I 



COMPANY AT THE MARRIAGE OF THEIR DAUGHTER 

JANET HELEN 

AND 

MR. JOHN WILLIAM DOE 

ON TUESDAY, MARCH THE FIFTH 
AT TWELVE O'CLOCK 

R. S. V. P. 

FOIJH HUNDRED WEST NINETY-SIXTH STREET 



Separate cards are generally enclosed for 
the wedding breakfast with the ceremony in- 



vitation, as: 



Wedding 
Breakfast 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE OF 

(name written in) 



AT BREAKFAST ON MONDAY, JUNE THE FIRST 
AT TWELVE O'CLOCK 



[ 44 ] 



THE INVITATION 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

accept with pleasure 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation to be present 

at the marriage of their daughter 

Janet Helen 

and 

Mr. John William Doe 

on Tuesday », May the seventh 

at twelve o'clock 

and afterward at the wedding breakfast 

When the wedding takes place in the country, 
a card is generally included, as : 



Acceptance 
Formal 
Wedding 
Invitation 



TRAIN LEAVES GRAND CENTRAL STATION AT 
TEN-FORTY-TWO FOR PLEASANTVILLE 



RETURN TRAIN LEAVES PLEASANTVILLE AT 
THBEE-TWENTT FOR NEW YORK 



Upon arrival motor cars, supplied by the host, 
should be sent to meet guests and to take them 
back to the station. 

[ 45 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Regret Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

regret exceedingly that they 

are unable to accept 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation to be present 

at the marriage of their daughter 

Janet Helen 

and 

Mr. John William Doe 

on Tuesday, May the seventh 

and afterward at the wedding breakfast 

Informal The informal home wedding is one to which 
Wedding only the immediate family and close friends are 
invited. These " quiet" weddings generally 
take place when there has been a recent death in 
the family, or merely from a preference for a 
small affair. For these, a short note is written 
generally by the bride-elect, as : 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 
Informal Owing to the recent death of my grand- 
Invitation mother, Mr. Doe and I are to be married very 
quietly at home on Tuesday, May the ninth, at 
eleven o'clock. We would be so pleased if you 
and Mr. Blank will come. 

Yours very sincerely, 

Janet H. Dash. 

[ 46 ] 



THE INVITATION 

or: 

Dear Mrs. Blank, 

Mr. Doe and I are to be married at home on 
Tuesday, May the ninth, at eleven o'clock. We 
are asking only a very few of our friends to be 
present and would be so glad to have you and 
Mr. Blank here on that day. 

Trusting that you will be able to come, I am, 
Yours very sincerely, 

Janet H. Dash. 
My dear Miss Dash, 

It will give us great pleasure to attend your Acceptance 
wedding on Tuesday, May the ninth, at eleven Informal 
o'clock. We are most glad to be counted in as 
your close friends. 

With cordial wishes to you and Mr. Doe, I am 
Sincerely yours, 

Mary Blank. 
My dear Miss Dash, 

It is indeed unfortunate that I shall be out Regret 
of town the day of your wedding, and regret Informal 
exceedingly the circumstance which prevents 
me from attending. 

Wishing you and Mr. Doe every happiness, lam, 
Cordially yours, 

Mary V. Howe. 

Note that the invitations speak of "mar- Wedding 
riage" while the replies say " wedding." Mar- Announce- 

m pn f r 

riage is the act of marrying, while wedding is the 
marriage ceremony. It is a very fine thread that 
denotes the distinction; nevertheless it is marked. 

[ 47 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



Second 
Marriage 



Engraved wedding announcements are never 
acknowledged by note. A card sent to the 
bride's parents and a personal call upon the bride 
after her return to town, if her new visiting 
card is enclosed, is all that is necessary. 



Announce- 
ment 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

ANNOUNCE THE MARRIAGE OF THEIR DAUGHTER 

JANET HELEN 

TO 

MR. JOHN WILLIAM DOE 

ON MONDAY, MAY THE TENTH 

ONE THOUSAND NINETEEN HUNDBED AND EIGHTEEN 



In case of a second marriage of the bride, 
the announcement reads (if she be a widow) 



MR. JOHN WILLIAM DOE 

AND 

MRS. JAMES EGBERT HOWL AND 

ANNOUNCE THEIR MARRIAGE 
ON MONDAY, AUGUST THE ELEVENTH 

ONE THOUSAND NINETEEN HUNDHED AND EIGHTEEN 



If the bride is a divorcee, the announcement 
reads: 

[ 48 ] 



THE INVITATION 



MR. JOHN WILLIAM DOE 

AND 

MRS. ELSIE BLANK HOWLAND 

ANNOUNCE THEIR MABRIAGE 
ON MONDAY, AUGUST THE ELEVENTH 

ONE THOUSAND NINETEEN HUNDRED AND EIGHTEEN 



Sudden death in the family, or any other Recalling 
serious cause, is sufficient reason for recalling Invitations 
the invitation or postponing the wedding. A 
small card, engraved if possible, is sent: 



OWING TO THE SUDDEN DEATH OF MB. JOHN 
DOE'S MOTHER, MR AND MRS. BLANK BEG TO RE- 
CALL THE INVITATIONS FOR THEIR DAUGHTER'S 
WEDDING ON TUESDAY, MAY THE NINTH. 



or: 



MR. AND MRS. DASH BLANK BEG TO RECALL THE 
INVITATIONS FOR THE MARRIAGE OF THEIR 
DAUGHTER, JANET HELEN, AND MR. JOHN 
WILLIAM DOE, ON TUESDAY, MAY THE NINTH. 



[ 49 ] 



or: 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



MB. AND MRS. DASH BLANK BEG TO ANNOUNCE 
THAT, OWING TO A SUDDEN DEATH IN THE 
FAMILY, THE WEDDING OE THEIB DAUGHTER, 
JANET HELEN, AND MB. JOHN WILLIAM DOE IS 
POSTPONED. 



BALLS 

When a ball is to be given on a large scale, 
the invitations are engraved and sent out from 
two to three weeks in advance. 

The word "ball" is never used except for an 
assembly or charity dance. 



Invitation 



MR. AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE OF 

Mr. and Mrs. Blank's 

COMPANY AT A COTILLION 

TO BE HELD AT THE HOTEL HILTMERE 

ON SATURDAY. JANUARY THE NINTH. 

AT TEN O'CLOCK 



PLEASE ADDRESS REPLY TO 

657 GRAND BOULEVARD 



[ SO ] 



THE INVITATION 



or: 



MR. AND MRS, BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE OF 

YOUR PRESENCE 

AT A COSTUME DANCE 

TO BE GIVEN AT THEIR HOME 

ON THURSDAY. FEBRUARY THE FIRST: 

AT ELEVEN O'CLOCK 



COSTUME DE RIGUEUR 
R.S.V.P. 

657 GRAND BOULEVARD 



or: 



MR, AND MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUEST THE PLEASURE QF 
(name to be written in) 

COMPANY ON . (STATE date) 



AT . 



(state hour) 



bal poudre 



Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

accept with pleasure 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

very kind invitation to a cotillion 

to be held at Hotel Hiltmere 

On Tuesday, January the ninth 

at eleven o'clock 

[ 5i ] 



Acceptance 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

or: 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

accept with pleasure 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

most kind invitation to a bal masque 

on the evening of February the sixteenth 

at eleven o'clock 

Regret Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

regret exceedingly that they 

are unable to accept 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation to attend a dance 

on Tuesday », February the seventeenth 

or: 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash Blank 

regret that, owing to a previous engagement, 

they are unable to accept 

Mr. and Mrs. Dash's 

very kind invitation to be present 

at their dance 

On Thursday, March the sixth 

Informal For smaller and more informal affairs, the 
Dances short social note, or visiting card with Danc- 
ing at ten, March the third, R. S. V. P., is used. 

[ 52 ] 



THE INVITATION 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

Will you and Mr. Dash give us the pleasure 
of seeing you here on Saturday, January 
seventh, at ten o'clock? We are planning to 
have a small dance and would be so pleased if 
you would join us. 

In the hope of seeing you both on the seventh, 
I am, 

Cordially yours, 
Mary V. Blank. 



MR, 


AND 


MRS, 


BLANK 


DASH 








AT HOME 






Dancing at ten 












March the third 












R. S. V. P. 








657 SOUTH 


STREET 



Visiting 

Card 

Invitation 



An invitation by visiting card should never 
be acknowledged by one. A short note, as in 
the informal acceptance or regret, should be 
sent within the week. 



My dear Mrs. Dash, 

Thank you so much for asking us to your Acceptance 
dance on Tuesday, March the third, at ten Informal 
o'clock. 

[ 53 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Both Mr. Blank and I are most pleased to 
accept. 

With cordial good wishes, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 

Cordelia G. Blank, 
or: 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

As Mr. Blank is as fond of dancing as am I, 
we are both looking forward with much pleasure 
to being with you on Tuesday, March the 
third, at ten o'clock. 

Yours very sincerely, 

Cordelia G. Blank. 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 
Informal Owing to Mr. Blank still being in mourning, 
Regret we shall have to forego the pleasure of accept- 
ing your kind and cordial invitation to your 
dance on Tuesday, March the third. 

Thanking you for wishing to have us with 
you, I am, 

Very sincerely yours, 
Marion V. Blank. 

RECEPTIONS AND AT HOMES 

In most cases invitations for receptions or 
at homes are never acknowledged by note. 
If we accept, our presence there on the ap- 
pointed day is sufficient. If we are unable to 
attend, our visiting card is sent to arrive on the 
day of the reception, — except where an an- 

[ 54 ] 



THE INVITATION 

swer is explicitly required, then the reply may 
be as follows: 

Mrs. Blank Dash Acceptance 

accepts with pleasure 

Mrs. Blank's 

kind invitation for Thursday afternoon 

October the thirtieth 

Mrs. Blank Dash 

regrets that she is unable to accept Regret 

Mrs. Blank's 

kind invitation for Thursday afternoon 

October the thirtieth 

Mrs. Blank Dash 

regrets that she is 

unable to be present at 

Mrs. Blank's 

At home on Thursday afternoon 

October the thirtieth 

CLUBS AND SOCIETIES 

The club or society invitation is generally 
issued in the name of the board of managers, 
board of governors, or whatever title may be 
given. If the club has an insignia it is used, 
embossed, at the heading. The invitations are 
always formal and engraved. 

[ 55 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



THE BOARD OF GOVERNORS 

OF THE 

NATIONAL WELFARE CLUB 

REQUEST THE PRESENCE OF 
(name written in) 



AND FRIENDS 

AT THE OPENING OF THEIR SPRING EXHIBITION 

ON THE AFTERNOON OF FRIDAY. JUNE THE SECOND 

ONE THOUSAND NINETEEN HUNDRED AND EIGHTEEN 

FROM THREE UNTIL FIVE O'CLOCK 



KINDLY REPLY TO 

MR. BLANK DASH 



400 EAST THIRD STREET 



or: 



THE BOARD OF MANAGERS OF THE 
NATIONAL WELFARE CLUB 

HAS THE HONOR TO INVITE 

. (NAME WRITTEN In) 



TO A CONFERENCE TO BE HELD 

AT FOUR O'CLOCK 

ON THE AFTERNOON OF THURSDAY, JUNE 1 8TH 

AT THE SOCIETY'S BUILDING 

145 CIVIC SQUARE 



PLEASE ADDRESS REPLY TO 
MR. BLANK DASH 

400 EAST THIRD STREET 



[ 56 ] 



THE INVITATION 

Mrs. Dash Blank 

accepts with pleasure 

The Board of Managers of the 

National Welfare Club's 

kind invitation for Thursday afternoon 

June the eighteenth 



Acceptance 



Mrs. Dash Blank 

regrets that she is unable to accept 

The Board of Governors 

of the 

National Welfare Club's 

kind invitation for Tuesday afternoon, June 18th 



Regret 



Where the invitation reads : 



MRS. BLANK DASH 

REQUESTS THE PLEASURE OF 

MRS, BLANK'S 

PRESENCE ON TUESDAY AFTERNOON, JUNE 18TH 

TO MEET THE BOARD OF GOVERNORS 

OF THE 

NATIONAL WELFARE SOCIETY 

FROM FOUR TO SEVEN O'CLOCK 



[ 57 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Acceptance Mrs. Dash Blank 

accepts with pleasure 

Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation to meet 

The Board of Governors of the 

National Welfare Society 

On Tuesday afternoon, June 18th 

Regret Mrs. Dash Blank 

regrets that a previous engagement 

prevents her from accepting 

Mrs. Dash's 

kind invitation to meet 

The Board of Governors of the National Welfare 

Society 

On Tuesday, June the eighteenth 

GARDEN PARTIES 

Garden parties are, for the most part, in- 
formal affairs, and many times the at home 
visiting card is used with the words, Garden 
Party, Thursday, June the second, from four to 
seven o'clock, written on the lower left-hand side. 
If one happens to be very friendly, do try and 
come may be added at the top of the card. 

If it happens to be a very large and formal 
affair a formal engraved invitation is issued 

[ 58 ] 



THE INVITATION 

and answered in kind. But this is rare, so 
examples are not given here. The garden 
party holds the place in society of an "at 
home" held out of doors. 

HOUSE OR WEEK-END PARTIES 

The week-end visit differs from the house 
party in that the visitor knows that he is ex- 
pected to come on Friday or Saturday and 
leave on the following Monday morning. The 
house party, on the other hand, might mean 
that the guest is to stay one or possibly two 
weeks. So the hostess, in writing her invita- 
tions, may mention the special cause, if there 
be one, such as, over Thanksgiving, or to meet 
a certain friend, etc. She will say a word or 
so regarding any sports to be indulged in, so 
that the guest may come equipped with bath- 
ing-suit, golf clubs, tennis racket, skates, etc., 
and a word is given about social entertain- 
ments as a hint as to the kind of clothes to 
bring. She will enclose a time-table, indicating 
the best train. 

My dear Miss James, 

I am asking a few friends over the next Invitation 
week-end and would be so glad if you can 
manage to come. 

[ 59 1 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

As the ice on Tinker's Pond is at its best, 
I am giving you but short notice, fearing a 
warm spell may come to prevent us from skat- 
ing there. 

John Doe and his sister, I hope, will be here, 
and I am asking only those who I know will be 
congenial, so do come and help us have a jolly 
time. 

Bring your warmest wraps as we will be do- 
ing quite a bit of motoring also. 

As this is very impromptu, I intend to have it 
most informal, so do not feel that you must 
bring evening clothes. 

I am enclosing a time-table. You will see 
that I have underscored the 3.32, as it is the 
best afternoon train. 

Let me hear from you at an early date that 
I may expect you on Saturday. 

With best wishes, I am, 

Very cordially yours, 

Mary Blank. 

My dear Miss Blank, 
Acceptance Your invitation to come to you next Satur- 
day for the week-end is far too alluring to re- 
fuse. It is most kind of you to include me in 
your little party. My skates stand ready 
and shall be the first things to go into my 
bag. 

I shall pray that this glorious cold spell con- 
tinues until, at least, after Ave have all enjoyed 
Tinker's Pond. 

Many thanks for your thoughtfulness in en- 

[ 60 ] 



THE INVITATION 

closing the time-table. I shall take the 3.32 
train as you suggest. 

In anticipation of seeing you next Saturday, 
I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Edith James. 

My dear Miss Blank, 

My desire is to write an acceptance to your Regret 
tempting invitation to spend the next week- 
end with you, but unfortunately I must put it 
aside and send my regrets instead. 

The latter part of the week is filled with en- 
gagements which I dare not break. An im- 
portant dinner comes on Saturday night and 
friends are due here to spend Sunday with me. 
So you see I am tied completely. It was most 
kind of you to think of me in planning your 
little party, and I greatly appreciate having 
been invited. 

Hoping to see you in the very near future, 
I am, 

Very cordially yours, 

Mary V. Dash. 

Upon our return from the week-end or house " The 
party, courtesy demands that a note be sent Bread-and- 
to our hostess, expressing our appreciation of j U ff er » 
the hospitality received. This kind of letter is 
known by the quaint term of "The Bread-and- 
Butter Letter," 

[ 61 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My dear Miss Blank, 

Having arrived safely home, my first thought 
is to write and tell you again how very much I 
enjoyed the perfectly splendid week-end I had 
with you. The memory of those good times 
will afford me many delightful moments for a 
long time to come. It was so good of you to 
have included me in your jolly little party. 

With kindest greeting to you and your 
brother, I am, 

Yours very cordially, 

Ethel V. Doe. 

or: 

My dear Miss Blank, 

Sitting again in my office I wonder if, after 
all, those delightful two days spent in your 
charming home were but a dream. 

I want to thank you again for your kind and 
cordial hospitality. 

Hoping soon to have the pleasure of seeing 
you in town, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 

David B. Vorse. 

or: 

Dear Edith, 

We arrived home still breathless from the 
exhilaration of those wonderful days spent with 
you. You were a dear to give us such a jolly 
time, and John and I are looking forward to the 
time when you can come and spend a while 
with us. Although we have no glorious lake 

[ 62 ] 



THE INVITATION 

for skating, we may, perhaps, be able to find a 
few other pastimes to interest you in our big 
city, although I know that anything short of 
Tinker's Pond will prove a poor substitute. 

Thank you, dear girl, for having us with you. 
John joins me in sending best regards to all the 
family. 

Affectionately yours, 

Mary K. Grainer. 

or: 

My dear Miss Blank, 

Tinker's Corners is a landmark in my small 
geography of " special selections." I am sure 
that the others whom you entertained so 
royally last week must feel as I do. The 
warmth of your hospitality will leave a glow 
in our memory for some time to come. With 
kindest greeting to your dear mother and 
brother, I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Helen D. Westvale. 

Very many times an invitation is given over Reminders 
the telephone, or en passant. Upon our return 
home, we intend to write this invitation down 
in our engagement book, — and forget to do so. 
In the meantime, the hostess is preparing for our 
coming. The day arrives and we are — where? 
It is a most awkward situation for us; and for 
our hostess it is more than trying. 

[ 63 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

The way to obviate this possibility is for 
the hostess-elect to follow up her verbal in- 
vitation by a ''reminder" note. This safe- 
guards her, at all events, for she has then done 
all she can to insure our comings 

Then, also, the verbal invitation alone, often 
leaves the guest in doubt: "Did Mrs. Dash 
say dinner at half past seven or eight?" We 
take a chance that it was for eight and arrive 
half an hour late; or, "Was it the seventh or 
ninth that Mrs. Dash asked us for dinner?" 
We go on the seventh and — embarrassment 
ensues. We appear in our dinner dress, and 
find Mrs. Dash wholly unprepared to receive us. 
Therefore, the necessity of the "reminder."* 

If the dinner is a formal affair, though the 
invitation has been given verbally, the word 
"reminder" is added in the upper left-hand 
corner to the regular engraved or written in- 
vitation. If it is an informal affair, a social 
note is sent as: 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

This is to remind you that I am looking for- 
ward to having you and Mr. Blank dine with 
us on Tuesday, May the sixth, at eight o'clock. 
I am so glad you will be able to come. 
Yours very sincerely, 

Mary B. Dash. 

[ 64 ] 



THE INVITATION 

The " reminder" is sent as a " follow-up" in 
any kind of an invitation. 

If, for any reason, it becomes necessary for a Canceling 
hostess to cancel or postpone a dinner, etc., she Invitation 
must send out a letter to each guest either by 
messenger or special delivery, when she does 
not wish to use the telephone. This must be 
done as soon as possible. If the invitation was 
formal, the cancellation should be also; if in- 
formal, a short note must be written. 

Owing to a sudden death {or illness) Formal 

in the family 

Mr. and Mrs. Blank Dash 

will be unable to entertain their friends 

at dinner on Tuesday, March the seventeenth 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

Owing to the sudden illness (or death) of Mr. Informal 
Dash's mother, I regret that we must recall the 
invitations for the dinner we had planned for 
Tuesday, March the seventeenth. 
Yours sincerely, 

Mary B. Dash. 

Upon receipt of either of the above notes, 
those invited should call and inquire, in case of 
illness, after the health of Mr. Dash's mother 
or, in case of death, pay a visit of condolence. 

[ 6 5 ] 



ments 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Breaking If, on the other hand, the invited guest is 
Engage- unable "to attend a function he or she has ac- 
cepted previously, a note must be sent at once 
by messenger or special delivery, — or by 
telegram, if a telephone is not handy, explaining 
the reason for having to break the engagement. 
The note would run: 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

An unforeseen and most unwelcome circum- 
stance prevents us from dining with you on 
Friday, November the sixteenth. 

Mr. Blank has been called to Connecticut 
on an important business matter which will 
detain him several days. I intend going also 
as the matter is of importance to me as well. 

We are most distressed to have to notify you 
at the last moment, but I know you will un- 
derstand and appreciate the situation. 

In sincere disappointment, I remain, 
Yours very sincerely, 

Mary B. Blank. 

or: 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

A great affliction has just come to us in the 
sudden death of my brother. I must therefore 
write to tell you that we shall be unable to 
have dinner with you on Wednesday, October 
the twentieth, as we had anticipated. 

[ 66 ] 



THE INVITATION 

Trusting that writing at this late hour will 
not put you to too much inconvenience, I am, 
Yours very sincerely, 

Helen T. Grew. 

Very often the closest friend of the bride- Invitation 
elect plans a " linen shower" for her. The *°* „ 
letter is always written informally. 

My dear Miss Doe, 

I am planning to give a " linen shower" for 
Jane Blank on Thursday, the sixth, at four 
o'clock. Will you not come and bring a linen 
gift with you ? 

If you can manage to be here by half past 
three it will give us time to arrange all the 
presents before Jane comes, as she is not to 
know anything about it. 

Hoping to see you on Thursday, I remain, 
Cordially yours, 

Emily S. Dawson. 

My dear Miss Dawson, 

Indeed, you can count on me for Thursday, Acceptance 
the sixth. I will be at your home at half past 
three, promptly, with my little remembrance. 
With best wishes, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 

Florence Doe. 

My dear Miss Dawson, 

As I expect to be out of town on Thursday Regret 
next, I regret I shall be unable to be with you 

[ 67 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

on that day. I will, however, send my gift for 
Jane to your home by half past three. 

With kind and cordial good wishes, I am, 
Very sincerely yours, 

Dorothy Tree. 



CHILDREN'S PARTIES 

Invitation A very charming card may be had, with a 
small illustration above or in the corner. It 
reads, " Won't you come to my party?" or 
words to that effect. The card is folded and 
upon the other side is a detachable answer- 
blank for the reply. 

All that is very simple for the one giving the 
party, provided she find such a card, but 
where this boon is not within reach, there must 
be the written note. So the mother or guar- 
dian writes to the parent or guardian of the 
child invited somewhat in this strain: 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

We are planning to give a little party for 
Edward on Friday, the seventeenth, and he is 
particularly anxious to have Ethel come. 

I do hope it can be arranged, for he would be 
so disappointed not to have her among his little 
guests. 

If the nurse will bring her at half past two, 
she will be in ample time. 

[ 68 ] 



THE INVITATION 

Trusting to have the pleasure of seeing your 
little girl here, I am, with kind regards, 
Sincerely yours, 

Mary B. Black. 

My dear Mrs. Black, 

It is most kind of you to ask Ethel to Acceptance 
Edward's party on Friday, the seventeenth, and 
I am very glad to be able to accept for her. 
She is looking forward with much eagerness to 
the event, and will be at your home at half past 
two o'clock. 

With kind wishes, I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Margaret Blank. 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 

As Ethel is just recovering from a heavy Regret 
cold, the doctor fears that it would be impru- 
dent to take her out just at present. 

I am so very sorry on the poor child's ac- 
count to have to decline your kind invitation 
for Edward's party on the seventeenth. 

Thanking you for your kindness in asking her, 
believe me, 

Cordially yours, 

Margaret Blank. 



INVITATION TO STRANGERS 

If we wish to bring a friend whom we think 
the hostess would enjoy having, it is permis- 
[ 69 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

sible to write and ask this privilege only when 
a dance or at home is held. 

My dear Mrs. Doe, 
Request Would it be presuming too greatly to ask if 
I might bring my friend Mr. Alfred Soley of 
Ontario with me on Tuesday evening, March 
the fourth? He is a charming fellow whom I 
feel sure you will find most congenial. 

If you are unable to grant me this request, 
please tell me frankly and I will understand. 

At any event, hoping to see you on the fourth, 
I am, 

Yours sincerely, 

Harold V. Brooks. 

My dear Mr. Brooks, 
Acceptance I shall be very glad to welcome your friend, 
Mr. Soley, among my guests on the fourth. 
My acquaintance with the few Canadians I 
have been fortunate to meet assures me already 
that I shall find him as charming as you 
say. 

With kind greetings, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 

Margaret V. Doe. 

Regret My dear Mr. Brooks, 

It would give me great pleasure to include 
your friend among my guests on the fourth, but, 
unfortunately, my place is so small that I fear 
we shall be somewhat crowded as it is. 

I hope at some other time I may have the 

[ 7o ] 



THE INVITATION 

opportunity of meeting Mr. Soley and trust 
you will ' forgive, and understand, my seeming 
inhospitality. 

With kind regards, I am, 

Yours sincerely, 

Margaret V. Doe. 



[ 7i 1 



B 1 



CHAPTER III 

THE LETTER OF THANKS 

ROADLY speaking, there are three dis- 
tinct kinds of duty letters: the letter of 
thanks, the letter of congratulation and the 
letter of condolence. Like the small boy who 
puts off the most difficult task until the last, 
the letter of condolence, requiring more thought, 
has been placed at the end. 

The letter of thanks should never be delayed, 

but sent as soon as possible after the gift or 

favor, etc., has been received. Excuses are but 

thin butter with which to cover our neglect. 

The " Looking a gift horse in the mouth" is poor 

Cheerful S p G rt; once we descend to counting his teeth 

i\ P C Pt 7)Pf 

we lose the joy and spontaneity that should 
send us rushing for our pens and cause the ink 
to flow rapidly in our expressions of pleasure at 
the receipt of the gift. 

It is the spirit that counts every time. 
Of Bride There is the letter of thanks that the bride 
for Wedding mus t send as soon as she can after the receipt 
' of a gift. It must be written by her, no matter 

[ 72 ] 



LETTER OF THANKS 

how rushed she may be, for the effect of receiv- 
ing a note of thanks from anyone other than 
the recipient of the gift is not only unpardon- 
able, except in case of illness, but shuts the 
door of gratitude with a bang in the face of 
the giver. A good and true maxim to bear in 
mind is that if we really want to do a thing, 
we can always find the time. 

In a case where the wedding is hurried, 
through change of plans, or where gifts come 
at the eleventh hour, the bride is excused from 
answering until after her honeymoon. In any 
event she must acknowledge the gift both for 
herself and for her husband, or husband-elect. 



My dear Mrs. Dash, 

It was most kind and thoughtful of you and 
Mr. Dash to send us that lovely vase. Both Acknowl- 
Mr. Doe and I are more than delighted to have edgment 
it. He wishes to join me in thanking you for 
your kind thought of us. 

Hoping to see you at our wedding, I am, 
Yours very cordially, 

Mary H. Graves. 

My dear Miss Dash, 

. The oyster forks are beautiful and just ex- 
actly what we wanted. It was very kind of you 

[ 73 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

to remember us so charmingly. John joins me 
in thanks and deep appreciation for your gift. 
With cordial good wishes, I remain, 

Always sincerely yours, 

Mary H. Graves. 
My dear Mrs. Roe, 

The cake basket has just arrived, and I feel 
that I must sit right down and tell you how 
lovely it is and how delighted we are to re- 
ceive it. Mr. Doe joins me in warmest thanks 
and appreciation of your kindness to us. 

Hoping to see you very soon after our return 
to town, I am, 

Most sincerely yours, 

Mary H. Graves. 
Dear Mabel, 

Your lovely gift awaited us upon our return 
to town yesterday. The sofa cushion is a 
dream of beauty and helps greatly to adorn our 
little home. I know that I shall have hard 
work keeping John from making it his special 
possession. 

Thank you so much, dear, for giving us such 
a lovely and useful gift. 

John joins with me in deep appreciation of 
your thoughtfulness, and hopes to see you 
in our little home in the very near future. 
Yours affectionately, 

Mary Graves Doe. 
Dear Mrs. James, 

Upon our return to town on Friday we found 
your beautiful flower dish awaiting us. It was 

[ 74 ] 



LETTER OF THANKS 

so kind of you to send it, and both my husband 
and I deeply appreciate your thoughtfulness. 

You must surely come soon and see for your- 
self how lovely it looks on our dining-room 
table. 

With many thanks, I remain, 

Very sincerely yours, 

Mary G. Doe. 

My dear Mrs. Trevor, 

Please forgive my seeming neglect in not 
acknowledging your lovely electrolier before, 
but our plans were changed, as you know, at the 
last moment, and we were unable even to open 
any of our wedding gifts before leaving town. 
We returned last Friday, and I am taking the 
very first opportunity to write and tell you 
how greatly we appreciate your gift and thank 
you for your'kind thought of us. 

Hoping you will understand the reason for 
the delay, I remain, 

Most sincerely yours, 

Mary G. Doe. 

My dear Mrs. Rogers, 

You and Mr. Rogers are more than kind to 
send us such a beautiful clock, and Mr. Doe 
and I wish to thank you ever so much for 
your thought of us. Every time the little 
clock chimes the passing of another happy hour 
in our new nest, we think of you. 

I do hope that when you find yourself in 

[ 75 ] 



m THE SOCIAL LETTER 

this neighborhood you will drop in and see for 
yourself how fine our new possession looks. 
With warm thanks from us both, believe me, 
Always cordially yours, 

Mary G. Doe. 

To facilitate acknowledging gifts, it is a good 
plan for the bride to have a book or list with 
gifts noted and donor named, and as each 
present is acknowledged, it may be checked off. 
This will prevent any error either in forgetting 
to write or misnaming the gift received. 

CHRISTMAS GIFTS 

My dear Mr. Blank, 

Letter from It was more than kind of you to remember 

Employee me so handsomely with the check 'that awaited 

to Employer me this morning. Please accept my thanks 

and know how much I appreciate your kind 

thought of me. 

With all good wishes for the coming year to 
you and yours, I am, 

Gratefully yours, 

John W. Doe. 

My dear Mr. Blank, 

"Your kind gift reached me with my other 
Christmas presents this morning. It makes me 
truly grateful for your remembrance of me with 
your generous check. 

Please accept my thanks and appreciation 

[ 76 ] 



LETTER OF THANKS 

of your kindness, and believe me, with all the 
Season's good wishes, 

Yours respectfully, 

John W. Doe. 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

Christmas was doubly a day of rejoicing To Ac- 
with all the beautiful gifts that came to me; quaintance 
not the least lovely of which was your beauti- 
ful work bag. Thank you so much for your 
great kindness in thinking of me. 

With every good wish for the coming year, 
I remain, 

Most cordially yours, 

Mary G. Doe. 

Dear Mrs. Blank, 

Your lovely painting stands in all its beauty 
among my Christmas gifts, and will adorn 
my wall upon the very first opportunity I can 
find. 

How very thoughtful and kind of you to re- 
member my preference, in your selection. 

With many thanks and cordial good wishes 
for the season, believe me, 

Yours most cordially, 

Mary G. Doe. 

My dear Mr. Rowe, 

Many, many thanks for your kind remem- 
brance which arrived Christmas morning. 
Your lovely book will make a valuable addi- 
tion to my small but growing library, besides 

[ 77 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

affording me some happy hours in the reading 
of it. 

With heartiest good wishes for a Happy New 
Year, I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Janet H. Blank. 

Dear Mabel, 

Expected gifts are a great joy, but unexpected 
remembrances prove a greater pleasure, as they 
bring the unlooked-for thought with them. Thank 
you so much for the calendar. I display it with 
great pride as being both lovely and unique. 

With best wishes to all at home for the com- 
ing year, I am, 

Affectionately yours, 

Janet H. Blank. 

My dear Mrs. Blank, 
To It is with the deepest gratitude that I write 
Benefactor to thank you for your lovely gift. The arm- 
chair is not only useful and an adornment to 
my little room, but will stand as a further 
sign of your many great kindnesses to me and 
mine. 

With every good wish to you and Mr. Blank 
for a joyous and prosperous New Year, I am, 
Yours ever gratefully, 

Mary R. Rowe. 

My dear Mr. Blank, 

Again an evidence of your great kindness 
has come to me with the check which I received 
on Christmas day. 

[ 78 ] 



LETTER OF THANKS 

The words to express my thanks as I would, 
are so inadequate that I feel wordless when I 
would write you to the fullest, of my gratitude. 

Please know that these few words of thanks 
have behind them the deepest appreciation a 
man can feel for your many kindnesses both 
now and in the past. 

I sincerely hope that the rich promises for 
the New Year will be fulfilled to the uttermost 
for you and yours, 

Gratefully and respectfully yours, 

Harold B. Rowe. 

Dear Mabel, 

How cruel of you to remember the passing fke 
time so accurately, but how kind to do it in Birthday 
such a charming way. I feel the edge is quite Letter 
taken off by your birthday gift. The beauti- 
ful buckle is a "joy forever." 
Thank you, dear, so very much. 

Affectionately yours, 

Mary G. Doe. 

My dear Helen, 

I thought I had kept the fact that I was 
having a birthday a profound secret, but your 
lovely book showed me that the "cat was out 
of the bag." It was most kind of you to re- 
member me, and I anticipate many delightful 
hours reading it. 

Thank you so much, 

Affectionately yours, 

Mary G. Doe. 

[ 79 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Dear Margaret, 

I thought I had announced publicly that I 
was having no more birthdays, yet lo and 
behold, your gift arrived early to remind me 
that I may not dodge the fact. The bar 
pin is far too lovely to have me scold you 
as I should, so, instead, I'll tell you how 
delighted I am with it, and thank you very 
much. 

Let me see you soon. With fond love, I 
am, 

Always affectionately yours, 

Mary G. Doe. 

My dear Mrs. Rowe, 

Thank you so much for your lovely birth- 
day gift. How good of you to remember me 
so charmingly. I shall put the pretty hand- 
kerchiefs into immediate use, and be the envy 
of all around me. 

With every cordial wish, I am, 

Yours most sincerely, 

Mary G. Doe. 

WEDDING ANNIVERSARIES 

i year. . . .Paper wedding 25 years . .Silver wedding 

5 years . . .Wooden wedding 30 " . . Ivory wedding 



10 " Tin wedding 40 " 

12 " Leather wedding 45 " 

15 " Crystal wedding 50 " 

20 " China wedding 60-75 " 

[ 80 ] 



. Woolen wedding 
. Silk wedding 
. Golden wedding 
. Diamond wedding 



LETTER OF THANKS 



My dear Mrs. Dash, 

We were quite taken by surprise by your lovely On Fifth 
gift on the occasion of our fifth anniversary, and Year An- 
were deeply touched by your kind thought of us. niversary 

Life has been so generous that we have both Gift 
said it seems but yesterday that we were ac- 
knowledging our wedding gifts. 

I can ask for nothing better for our friends 
than that they may have the same happy ex- 
perience that has been John's and mine. 

Thank you so much, dear Mrs. Dash, for 
the charming book-rack. When you come to 
see us, which I hope will be soon, you will see 
that I have put it into immediate use. 

John joins me in very kindest regards and 
appreciation of your kindness. 

Yours always cordially, 

Helen V. Rowe. 

Dear Mrs. Blank, 

With all your many interests, how good of 
you to remember us on our silver anniversary. 
Now that it is past we begin to feel that we are 
a very old couple indeed. 

Thank you, my dear, for your sweet gift and 
the kind thought that accompanied it. The 
silver paper-knife is exquisite. 

My best wish for you is that you also will 
attain a silver anniversary under auspices as 
kindly and beautiful as ours has been. It is 
a wonderful feeling to know that we have both 
weathered some of life's storms and put our 
ship into port safe and sound each time. 

[ 81 ] 



On 

acknowledg- 
ing Gift for 
a Longer 
Period of 
Marriage 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Mr. Rowe joins me in expressing his deep 
appreciation of your kindness. 
With all good wishes, believe me, 

Always yours sincerely, 

Helen V. Rowe. 

My dear Mr. Roberts, 
For Favor It was characteristic of you to go to all that 
Received trouble of talking personally to Mr. Doe on my 
behalf. A few words from you will have more 
weight in furthering my cause than endless 
communications from others. I had no idea I 
was to be so fortunate. 

Believe me, I am most grateful for all your 
kindness to me in this matter. 
In deep appreciation, I remain, 
Sincerely yours, 

Harold F. Weekes. 

My dear Mrs. Smith, 

Your letter enclosing the list of names of the 
pew-holders of St. Francis' Church came to 
me yesterday. I realize by its length the 
amount of work I caused you. Believe me, I 
am truly grateful and know that your interest 
in this matter will aid me materially in my work. 
Thank you so very much. 

With kindest regards, I am, 

Yours gratefully, 

Mary Blank Rowe. 

My dear Mr. Howe, 

Through your great kindness I was able to 
secure the position as secretary to the comp- 

[ 82 ] 



LETTER OF THANKS 

troller. I know you must realize, more than 
these words can convey, how much this means 
to me, and how very grateful I am to you for 
speaking to Mr. Street in my behalf. 

My thanks will lie, not only in words, but 
in the effort I shall make to prove worthy of 
your faith in my ability. 

With sincere good wishes and deep appre- 
ciation, I am, 

Gratefully yours, 

George F. Small. 

Dear Mrs. White, 

How good of you to have made the lovely For Gift 
coverlid for my baby. Knowing how ex- to Baby 
tremely busy you always are, I appreciate it 
so much more, and am very grateful to you for 
sending it. 

Won't you run in some time soon and see how 
sweet your handiwork looks tucked around my 
little one? 

With many thanks, I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Martha Todd Rowe. 

Dear Mrs. Dash, 

The little bib-holder is just lovely and so 
very useful. Even at this early stage I see 
where it will be put into constant and effective 
use. 

I want you so much to come and see us. If 
I am a bit proud of my little one, I believe that 

[ 83 ] 



. THE SOCIAL LETTER 

this is a privilege granted to all new mothers, 
and so may be forgiven. 

Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness. 
Yours cordially, 

Janet Grant Howe. 

My dear Mrs. Harland, 
Acknowl- How good of you to remember Robert's 
edging Gift birthday. The pitcher and bowl are the de- 
to Child light of his life. I know that now his cereal 
will taste so much better than before. 

Thank you so much for your sweet thought of 
my little boy. 

With ever cordial regard, I am, 

Always sincerely yours, 

Janet G. Howe. 

Dear Mrs. Austin, 

Mary is in the seventh Heaven of joy as, 
thanks to your great kindness, she at last owns 
a doll that talks. She says that she feels now 
that she has a real baby, and truly makes a 
sweet little mother. 

Only for the fact that I am so grateful to 
you for giving my little girl so much happiness, 
I should want very much to scold you for your 
extravagance in choosing her gift. 

Mary's thanks are as heartfelt as are mine. 

With kindest regards, I remain, 

Very sincerely yours, 

Helen M. Wood. 



[ 84 ] 



CHAPTER IV 
THE LETTER OF CONGRATULATION 

THE frame of mind is a tremendous factor 
in all our activities. The actor on the 
stage, if he be a true artist, lives his part, 
whether joyous or tragic. Looking at it fairly 
it is not deceit that he is practicing, — he is 
merely fitting his personality to the emotional 
environment in which he finds himself at that 
particular time. The part calls for tears — 
he sheds them. 

Are we not all actors in this life's drama? 
Shakespeare has said it. Therefore, let us get 
into our part. If duty calls for expressions of 
joy, let us " think" joy, and so give twofold. 
We, ourselves, get more out of it in the long 
run on its inevitable rebound. This does not 
mean going through a stereotyped set of phrases 
laid out for a specific occasion. 

Why make our duty letters obligatory 
burdens? 

So the note of congratulation must contain 
a genuine tone of gladness; it must ring true, 
[ 85 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

otherwise it were better not to write at all. 
In many cases where the person to be con- 
gratulated is but a recent acquaintance, the 
visiting card with " heartiest congratulations" 
is sufficient. 

In other instances, as for the young mother, 
the recovery from an illness, or a wedding 
anniversary, the card is often accompanied with 
flowers or book, etc. 

To the bride one sends "the best of good 
wishes," never congratulations; these are re- 
served for the groom when writing. 

Congratulatory telegrams are addressed to 
the newly wedded pair, and should be sent on 
the day of the wedding, to reach them as soon 
after the ceremony as possible. 

My dear Florence, 

Letter to A little bird has just told me a wonderful bit 

Engaged of news which has made me very happy for 

Girl you. I have not had the pleasure of Mr. 

Roberts' acquaintance, but know that if he is 

your choice he must indeed be all that is good 

and charming. 

Incidently, I think him a mighty lucky 
fellow, and am only waiting the time when I 
can tell him so in person. 

All the happiness you so richly deserve and 
have helped others to attain, I wish you most 
heartily. 

[ 86 ] 



LETTER OF CONGRATULATION 

Hoping very soon to hear the good news from 
your own lips, I am, with fond love, 
Affectionately yours, 

Janet V. Rowe. 



Dear Florence, 

The most joyful news that I have heard for a 
long time was the announcement of your en- 
gagement to George Roberts. Knowing him as 
well as I do, I can't quite decide which of you 
is the luckier. I simply know that each is to 
be congratulated. 

Dear girl, I am so very glad for you, as I 
realize how happy you must be; knowing you 
are so, makes me rejoice in your happiness. 

With every good wish to you both, believe 
me, 

Fondly yours, 

Emily. 

My dear Travers, 

So you've "gone and done it." I have always Man to 
claimed that there is no such creature as a his 
"confirmed bachelor," and you have proved it. Engaged 

I have not had the pleasure of meeting Miss Friend 
Baker, but knowing your fastidious taste and 
discrimination in the fair sex, I am reassured 
on that score. 

Some day I hope to meet the lady of your 
choice, for I know that I shall find her all that 
is charming. 

l 8 7 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My heartiest congratulations are yours, my 
dear fellow, on your good fortune. 

Wishing you every kind of good luck, I am, 
Sincerely yours, 

James F. Brent. 

My dear Saunders, 
For The news of your election as president of our 
Honorary borough is indeed inspiring, and I am doubly 
Distinction glad, first, in the knowledge that we have a 
man at the head in whom all can trust, and 
we know that he will fulfill his mission with in- 
tegrity, and secondly, because he is my friend. 
May your administration be one of success 
to you in every way. I know you have the 
hearty cooperation of many loyal followers. 
With sincere congratulations, I am, 
Yours cordially, 

Horace Radclif Cole. 

My dear Mr. Dash, 

Upon my return to town I was informed of 
the great honor that has been conferred upon 
you in the offer of the presidency of this Ameri- 
can Steel Car Corporation. There is no man 
I know whom I would rather see in this posi- 
tion, because you have earned it so squarely. 
Such material acknowledgment of your best 
efforts gives you renewed energy and courage. 

My best wishes are yours for continued 
success. 

Yours sincerely, 

John F. McLane. 

[ 88 ] ' 



LETTER OF CONGRATULATION 

My dear Miss Blank, 

I was more than glad to hear the splendid 
news of your good fortune, and I only hope 
that it is but a forerunner of greater things. 

As a matter of fact, I was not surprised to 
learn that you had been made head super- 
visor, for I knew that with your ability, tact 
and perseverance, you would eventually attain 
your goal. No one is more deserving of the 
promotion than you, and I congratulate you 
most heartily. 

Yours very sincerely, 

Thomas Gaunt. 

The birthday letter should carry with it a Birthday 
certain amount of tact, especially when written Letter 
to one who has many years to her count, and 
would rather -not count them! So let us try 
to make the occasion one of true rejoicing. 

Dear Janet, 

To-morrow will be your birthday and a red- 
letter day in your calendar. I am only sorry 
that so many miles separate us, and that these 
few ink scratches must be my messenger in 
wishing you very many happy other birthdays 
to come. 

As the Orientals have it, "May you live a 
thousand years." 

I am sending you a little gift by this post, and 
hope that it will reach you in time for the 
celebration. 

[ 89 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

With kind regards to all at home and much 
love to you, I am, 

Affectionately yours, 

Caroline Judson. 

Dear Helen, 

Another little dot will be added to your small 
score of years by the time this reaches you. 
My heartiest wishes are for other and many 
"dots" to come, under just such happy aus- 
pices as this one must be for you. 

The little gift I am sending by this mail, will, 
I hope, be of service as well as a token of my 
best wishes. 

With deep affection, I am, 

Ever warmly yours, 

Cecile Goodson. 

My dear Miss Janet, 
From Man I am sending my few words of congratula- 
te Girl on tion with this little token to add to the number 

her f happy reminders of your birthday. 
Birthday Please accept my heartiest greeting. 

Yours sincerely, 

Charles H. de Witt. 

My dear Mrs. Howe, 
On I want you to know that I am thinking of 
Wedding you, and that my heartiest good wishes go to 
Anniver- y OU and Mr. Howe on this, the tenth anni- 
sary versary of your marriage. 

Yours very sincerely, 

Janet F. Wilson. 

[ 9o ] 



LETTER OF CONGRATULATION 

My dear Edith and James, 

My heartiest congratulations on the advent 
of the twentieth anniversary of your marriage. 
You are certainly a shining example of what a 
model couple should be! 

With every good wish for the coming years, 
that they may continue to bring the joy and 
blessings you both so richly deserve, I remain, 
Yours warmly, 

Edith Wayne Dobbs. 

These little notes are sent by hand with a gift Upon 

of flowers, fruit, book oY a small token. x ecover y 

• ii-i •• r from an 

Much tact is needed m the writing of such a M ness 

note, for one must bear in mind that the con- 
valescent is still weak and perhaps sensitive 
about mentioning his illness. The few words 
must, therefore, be tactful, in order to convey 
strength and courage. 

Dear Mrs. Williams, 

Please accept these few roses as a small token 
to express my joy at your recovery from a long 
and tedious illness. It is indeed a glad bit of 
news to hear how rapidly you are convalescing. 

When you are somewhat stronger, I do hope 
you will let me come to see you, if only for a 
few moments. 

With every good wish for renewed health, 
I am, most cordially yours, 

Edith Frayme Mott. 

[ 9i ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My dear Miss Browne, 

Here is a little book with which to while away 
some of the hours of your convalescence. I 
found so much pleasure in reading it that I am 
giving it to you, that you may also enjoy it. 

I trust that very soon you will be well enough 
to be about as usual, and that you will be able 
to look back upon the dark days just passed as 
necessary evils to promote lasting good. 

With every good wish for a continued gain in 
strength, I am, 

Yours very sincerely, 
Charles Edward Howe. 



[ 92 ] 



CHAPTER V 
THE LETTER OF CONDOLENCE 

ONE of the most difficult forms of written 
etiquette is the letter of condolence. It 
is not so much what to say to the bereaved, but 
what not to say that is our stumbling block. 
Sympathy tends to render some of us at a 
loss for words — for the right words. Many 
of us feel the necessity of writing at length to 
express our sorrow; we desire to convey a 
warmth of feeling, to give the handclasp of 
encouragement and sympathy. 

At such a time platitudes irritate, for they 
do not touch the heart. A bit of homely 
philosophy, if you will, but not in the nature of 
preaching. The purpose of writing is to try to 
help the bereaved brave over a soul-rending 
period; a time when the need of true friends 
and their service of love are most required. 

Of course, this has to do with those whom 
we know intimately; where the person is only an 
acquaintance, letters of condolence may seem 

[ 93 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

intrusive, so a visiting card with " sincere 
sympathy" or " heartfelt sympathy" is all 
that is necessary. Perhaps a few flowers 
sent with the card would be greatly appre- 
ciated. 

But it were wise to face the fact that the 
letter of condolence is a difficult bit of writing 
at best. Filling our pages with empty senti- 
ments, flowery quotations reserved for such sad 
occasions, leave the recipient unmoved. Even 
with our closest friends, we should shrink from 
touching on the other's grief. Above all, let 
us not dilate upon the manner in which the de- 
ceased died. Our letter must contain words of 
courage that will soothe, not wound. Neither 
let us delude ourselves by thinking that the 
bereaved is too grieved to notice the letter, so 
long as we have written; this is not so, for 
in many cases one's state of mind is made 
supersensitive. 

We should respect the feelings of the person 
to whom we write, especially at such a time. 
Do not be hypocrites; if the loss happens to be 
"for the best" in every sense, do not write 
reams about "the great sorrow that is yours." 
If the loss is truly great, let us realize and ex- 
press our sympathy accordingly. 

All letters should be sent immediately upon 

[ 94 ] 



THE LETTER OF CONDOLENCE 

receiving intimation of a death. Where cards 
are sent the bereaved family return an engraved 
acknowledgment on a black-bordered card, a 
few weeks after. 

Mourning stationery is most heavily bordered Stationery 
for a widow or a widower, and is used as long 
as he or she is in deep mourning. This is de- 
creased with the change of mourning, and all 
stamping should be done in black, as a rule, 
only upon the death of the immediate family, 
including grandparents. 

As the letter of condolence is always fol- 
lowed by a call, these letters are generally ac- 
knowledged verbally by the family at that 
time. But in cases where, for instance, the 
writer lives away from town, the note is gen- 
erally answered by a few words from one of the 
members of the family. 



MRS. JAMES BRENTWORTH AXD FAMILY 

GRATEFULLY ACKNOWLEDGE 
YOUR KIND EXPRESSION OF SYMPATHY 



Acknowl- 
edgment 
Formal 
Card 
Engraved 



Or cards may be bought already engraved 
with the names to be filled in, as : 

[ 95 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



_(name to be filled in) 



GRATEFULLY ACKNOWLEDGE 

(name to be filled in) 



KIND EXPRESSION OF SYMPATHY 



Dear Mrs. Blank, 
Informal I deeply appreciate your note, and want to 
Acknowl- thank you for your kind sympathy. I do not 
edgment know any friendship I value more than John's 
and yours, and the letters you both have writ- 
ten fill my heart with gratitude. 

We are always helped in time of sorrow by 
words of comfort and consolation, and I am 
sure you understand how much yours mean to 
me at this time. 

Thank you many, many times, and let me 
assure you that your kindness will not be for- 
gotten. 

Yours most sincerely, 

James B. Conrad. 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

Your letter with its kind expressions of 
sympathy was gratefully received. It is no 
small measure of comfort to know how greatly 
my dear husband was beloved and respected 
by all, as shown by the many letters, including 
yours, which I have received. 

[ 96 1 



THE LETTER OF CONDOLENCE 

With many thanks for your kindness, I re- 
main, 

Sincerely yours, 

Mathilde Gotham Wentworth. 



My dear Mrs. Parsons, 

I have put off acknowledging your kind letter 
of sympathy until I regained a little strength 
after my long trial. I want to tell you how 
deeply I appreciate your thought of me, and 
how much courage you instilled into my dis- 
traught mind at a time when I needed it most. 
Believe me, I am truly grateful. 

I expect to return to town on the fifth of next 
month and hope you will come and see me 
some afternoon shortly thereafter. 
Yours sincerely, 

Mathilde G. Wentworth. 



My dear Mr. Johnson, 

Thank you so much for your kind expressions 
of sympathy. I deeply appreciate your offer 
to be of service to me at this time, and, although 
I need not trouble you, it is a great source of 
comfort to know that I may call upon you 
should I have to do so. 

With gratitude for all your many kindnesses, 
I am, 

Yours very sincerely, 

Mathilde G. Wentworth. 

[ 97 1 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 
Letter of It is with the deepest regret that I hear of 
Condolence your sorrow. I realize, as only one who has 
upon gone through the same sad experience can, just 
Death of w hat it means to you. 

Close There must be great solace in the knowledge 
that your dear husband leaves behind him many 
who had the honor of knowing him — in love 
and respect. 

You have, dear Mrs. Dash, my heartfelt 
sympathy. 

Yours most sincerely, 

Agatha H. Small. 

Dear Florence, 

I wish I might be with you at this sad time 
to better share your great sorrow. 

If thoughts are as potent as many say they 
are, you have mine for all the strength and 
courage to help you in this terrible trial. 

With deepest and sincerest sympathy, I am, 

In all love, 

Mabel. 

My dear Janet, 

Your great sorrow is shared by very many of 
us who knew your dear mother and the beauty 
of her life. To have had such a parent is a 
privilege accorded, alas, to but few. How much 
more, then, must you, in the days to come, 
cherish a memory as sacred as hers is to 
you. 

• [ 98 ] 






THE LETTER OF CONDOLENCE 

If I can be of service in any way, don't hesi- 
tate to call upon me. I should take great com- 
fort in the fact that I could help you, if ever so 
little, in sharing your deep sorrow. 

Yours in deepest sympathy and affection, 

Elsie G. Banks. 

My dear Baker, 

The new^s of your great loss has just come 
to me. In years past I had the privilege of 
knowing your sister and realize, therefore, 
your grief. Her many deeds of charity and 
kindness stand as a fitting monument to her 
beautiful life. 

With profound sympathy, I remain, 
Yours sincerely, 

Gerald Du Bois. 

My dear Straight, 

Pray accept my sincerest sympathy in the 
loss you have sustained. 

Sincerely yours, 

Munroe R. Truesdale. 

My dear Miss Rowe, 

At such a time it seems almost like intrusion 
to even express my sympathy for you in your 
deep sorrow. I want you to know how grieved 
I am at your loss and to assure you of my warm 
friendship. 

Yours sincerely, 

James B. Forrest. 

[ 99 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My dear Miss Trotwood, 
On I have just been told of your Uncle's death 
Relative anc J realize how much of a shock it must have 
more b een to you. I wish to tell you how very 
Distant, gr ; evec i b^ y[ v Dash and I are at your loss. 
With assurance of my regards, I am, 
Yours most sincerely, 

Amelie V. Dash. 

or Friend My dear Travers, 

I read in the paper the other day the sad 
news of James Cunningham's sudden death. 
Knowing how closely associated you both 
were, I wish to express my sincere sympathy at 
your loss. 

With assurance of my regards, I remain, 
Sincerely yours, 

Dent V. Conway. 

My dear Goodson, 
On I was indeed shocked and grieved to read of 
Material the fire which destroyed your wonderful stable. 
Loss J know that no amount of insurance will ever 
Loss of compensate you for the death of the horses you 
Animal loved so dearly, so hasten to extend my sym- 
Pet pathy for what I know must be a great tribula- 
tion to you. 

Faithfully yours, 

Duncan B. Smith. 

My dear Miss Dash, 

I was so sorry to hear of the loss by theft 
of your wonderful miniatures, knowing how 

[ ioo ] 



THE LETTER OF CONDOLENCE 

greatly you prized them, and how many years 
of patient search you expended in getting your 
collection. 

I am hoping that, with the detectives at 
work, you will soon be in possession of them 
once more; I have great faith in their success. 
Trusting to hear of their recovery, I am, 
Cordially yours, 

Calder G. Blackfoote. 

My dear Husted, 

I am more sorry than I can say to learn of 
your trouble. I realize that "the fortunes of 
war" offer poor philosophy when one gets hurt, 
but with your youth, vigor, and perseverance, 
I have great hopes of a quick retrievement 
from your present difficulty. 

If I can be of any service, I shall be glad to 
have you call upon me. 

With all good wishes for better luck, I am 
Yours sincerely, 

David R. Upton. 

Dear Mrs. Blank, 

There are few words that can adequately ex- On 
press my very deep sympathy for you at this Soldier 
time; while I realize also the great consolation y? st ln 
you must have in the fact that your son died a e 
in the defense of his country, with so many 
brave deeds to his count. It is indeed a privi- 
lege to be the parent of such a son. 

Since the Greater Will decreed that he must 
go — how wonderful to die as he did. 

[ ioi ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

You have the courage of which Spartan 
mothers were made and I know you are sharing 
the bravery of your beloved boy in accepting 
this terrible ordeal as befitting his mother. 
Yours in deepest sympathy, 

Anthony R. Frow. 

My dear Gainer, 

You are indeed sharing the sorrow of many, 
many parents whose sons have fallen in battle. 
I had hoped that your boy would have been 
spared, but since it was not to be, I know you 
accept his loss with the fortitude he would 
have you show. 

You have the deepest sympathy of many; 
not only of his friends here, but his comrades 
in battle. 

With sincere regards, I remain, 
Yours faithfully, 
Donald S. White. 



[ 1 02 ] 



ship 



CHAPTER VI 
CLUB CORRESPONDENCE 

IN regard to this matter, a printed or en- Accepting 
graved formal notice is sent to the prospec- Member- 
tive member, after having been passed by the 
board or committee on elections. This notice 
is to be answered in the following manner: 

Mrs. James Woods 

accepts with pleasure 

the honor conferred by the 

Committee on Elections 

to become a member of the 

Druid Club 

and begs to thank them for the 

courtesy offered 

Or where the answer is to be sent to a person 
specified on the invitation: 

Mrs. Robert Deane, 
40 Murray Place, 
N. Edgewood, Mo. 

Dear Madam: 

It is with great pleasure that I accept the 
kind offer of the Druid Club to become a mem- 

[ 103 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

ber. Kindly extend to the Committee on Elec- 
tions my sincere appreciation of the honor 
conferred. 

Yours very truly, 

Natalie F. Rudder. 



or: 

Mrs. George F. Rudder 
having received notice that the 
Membership Committee of the 

Druid Club 

has acted upon her nomination, 

accepts with pleasure their kind invitation 

to become a member, provided it does not entail 

any personal work or responsibility, 

other than dues 



Among men, letters are often sent to their 
places of business, sometimes typewritten and 
many times on business paper. Some men have 
two kinds of office paper — the commercial 
and the social, both stamped. The social 
stationery will have the address, but not 
the name of the firm or occupation, stamped 
thereon. 

[ 104 ] 



CLUB CORRESPONDENCE 

John Emery, Esq., Secretary. 
Druid Club, 

North Edgewood, Mo. 

Dear Sir: 

I am informed through a notice sent by your 
Committee on Elections that I am now a mem- 
ber of your club. 

I wish to thank said Committee through you 
as secretary, for the courtesy thus extended, and 
say that I accept with pleasure. 

Yours truly, 

Eben Crane. 

Mr. Eben Crane Refusal 

regrets that he is unable 

to accept the kind offer of the 

Board of Governors of the 

Westvale Club 

to become a member, owing to 

his protracted absence from town 

this coming winter 

John Emery, Esq., 
Westvale Club, 
Westvale, N. H. 

Dear Sir: 

Will you kindly convey my thanks to the 
Board of Directors of the Landscape Gardeners' 
Club for their courtesy in nominating me for 

[ 105 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

membership, and express my regret at my in- 
ability to accept this honor at the present time. 
Yours truly, 

Robert W. Quirk. 
Hobert Graves, 

Secretary Landscape Gardeners' Club, 
Cincinnati, Ohio. 

Mrs. Frank Nash 
regrets that, owing to absence 
from town during the winter months, 
she is unable to accept the 
Board of Directors' kind offer 
to become a member of the Druid Club, 
but thanks them for the courtesy extended 

Mrs. Robert Deane, 
40 Murray Place, 
N. Edgewood, Mo. 

Dear Madam: 

While I greatly appreciate the honor con- 
ferred upon me by an election to membership 
of the Druid Club, I am obliged to deny myself 
the pleasure of accepting, owing to the many 
interests to which I must give my time. 

Kindly convey to the president and members 
of the club my thanks for their expressions of 
good-will. 

Yours very truly, 

Mary V. Blank. 

[ 106 ] 



CLUB CORRESPONDENCE 

This may be sent in third-person form or by Resigning 

a social note. The former is generally used J™*} 
- . ! i Mud 

when resignation is due to some unpleasantness. 

If, however, the resignation is of an amiable 
nature, it would be only courteous to state the 
reason, briefly, in a personal note to the sec- 
retary, to whom such communications should 
be sent. 



Mrs. Joseph Blank Formal 

begs to extend to the 

Board of Directors of the 

Druid Club 

her resignation as a member, 

this act to take effect from the 

date of writing 

March 5, 1918 



Mrs. Robery Dean, Secretary, 
40 Murray Place, 
Edgewood, Mo. 

My dear Mrs. Deane, 

I herewith beg to extend my resignation as Informal 
member of the Druid Club, to become effective 
from above date, as I intend leaving town for 
an indefinite time. 

[ 107 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Kindly convey to the Board of Directors my 
regrets. 

Yours very truly, 

Janet F. Duncan. 

In a social letter written by a man, the name 
and address of the person to whom he is writ- 
ing is put after the signature at the left-hand 
corner. This is less business-like than when it 
is at the beginning of a letter. 



PRESENTING FRIEND FOR MEMBER- 
SHIP TO A CLUB 

A few lines sent by a member to the secre- 
tary of a club to be read at the meeting of the 
board is the general rule. 

Mr. Thomas Grant, Secretary, 
60 James Street, 
Livingston, Ala. 

My dear Mr. Grant, 

I beg to suggest Mr. John F. Flower, General 
Manager of the Sweetster Carpet Company, 
as a member of the Republic Club. 

Will you kindly put his name up for con- 
sideration at the next meeting of the board? 

I am very glad to stand sponsor for Mr. 
Flower, and know you will have no difficulty 

1 108 1 



CLUB CORRESPONDENCE 

in finding others who will be pleased to indorse 
my recommendation. 

Yours very truly, 

Emory H. James. 

Mrs. F. S. Close, 

Secretary, Cosmos Club, 

New York City. 
My dear Mrs. Close, 

Mrs. Arthur F. Dwight of 600 West Drive 
would very much like to become a member of 
our club, and has requested me to suggest her 
name to the Committee on Elections. I am 
more than glad to do so, and feel sure that she 
would prove a most valuable adjunct to our 
list of members. 

With regards, I am, 

Yours very truly, 

Winifred B. Vose. 

ACKNOWLEDGING PRESENTATION OF 

NAME TO CLUB 
My dear Trevor, 

Your note telling me that you had presented 
my name to the Board of Directors of the Sports 
Club for membership is good news. 

Many thanks for your courtesy and trouble 
in my behalf. 

Yours faithfully, 

Peter F. Kemble. 
Norton Trevor, Esq., 
43 Roundville Place, 

Kensington, 111. 

[ 109] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My dear Mrs. Smylie, 

Through your kindness I have received 
notice that I have been elected a member of 
the Etchers' Club. This courtesy is greatly 
appreciated by 

Yours sincerely, 

Mabel F. Greenstone. 



EXTENDING HOSPITALITY OF CLUB 
TO FRIEND FROM OUT OF TOWN 

In extending the hospitality of the club, the 
friend gives a formal card, such as is issued to 
members, extending this courtesy. This card 
must be signed not only by a member, but by 
the chairman of the house committee, when 
the guest's name is entered in the club register. 

The following are a few letters such as would 
be written to a friend inviting him to stay at 
a club while in town. 

My dear Benson, 

I am glad to know that you will arrive here 
the day after to-morrow, and, although I shall 
be out of town when you come, I wish to ex- 
tend to you the hospitality of the Rocking 
Stone Club of which I am a member. 

I enclose a card, herewith, and I hope you 
will enjoy the old place as much as I do. 

[ no ] 



CLUB CORRESPONDENCE 

I shall lose no time in looking you up when 
I return at the end of the week. 
With all good wishes, I am, 

Yours faithfully, 

J. H. Stevenson. 
Edward Benson, Esq., 
The Bristol, 
Brayton, N. J. 

THE ROCKING STONE CLUB 
NEW YORK 

January 5, 1918. 
My dear Andrews, 

You will arrive in town on Thursday and I 
wish to be the first to greet you. If you are 
not already engaged, come and dine with me 
here at six-thirty that evening, and I shall be 
glad to put you up at this club during your 
stay. In any event, I shall provide you with a 
card when I see you. 

Hoping to have the pleasure of your company 
on Thursday, I am, 

Faithfully yours, 

Edward V. Close. 
Captain George Andrews, 
The Bristol, 
Brayton, N. J. 

My dear Close, 

Many thanks for the courtesy in extending Acceptance 
me the hospitality of your club. It is with 

[ in i 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

great pleasure that I accept your kind offer to 
make it my headquarters while in town. 

Hoping to see you upon your return to the 
city, I am, 

Gratefully yours, 

George Andrews. 
Edward V. Close, Esq., 
56 Broadway, New York. 



My dear Saunders, 

Your card extending the courtesy of the 
club, together with your kind note of welcome, 
is gratefully received. I regret, however, my 
inability to avail myself of your hospitality, as 
I have already made arrangements to stay with 
my wife's family while in town. 

Thanking you, and hoping to see you during 
my short stay, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 

Munroe L. Upton. 



Letter of This letter is sent by the secretary on behalf 

Condo- f the Board of Directors, Committee, etc., 
lence upon 1 • i 1 j 

death of a u P on a resolution voted at a board meeting 

Member to that effect. 

of Club It can be either formal or informal, accord- 
to £ amity j n g tQ t j ie landing of a member, or the desire 
of the club. 

[ 112 ] 



CLUB CORRESPONDENCE 

The President and Members of the Formal 

Sports Club 

beg to tender their sympathy to 

Mrs. James Ridder and family 

for their sad loss 

My dear Mrs. Ridder, 

On behalf of the president and members of Informal 
the Sports Club, I beg to tender to you their 
deep sympathy for you and yours in your 
great sorrow. 

Yours very truly, 

Hyram B. Grew, 

Secretary. 
Mrs. George Ridder, 
60 York Place, 

New Brunswick, N. S. 



[ "3 1 



CHAPTER VII 

MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Bon fT^HE speeding of the parting guest by letter 
Voyage J^ j s a p re tty attention and may be accom- 
panied or not by a book, fruit or flowers. The 
bon voyage letter is generally written when the 
traveler-elect goes by steamer. In sending such 
a note it is wise to see that it arrives in good 
season; since time and tide refuse to dally, 
steamers,- therefore, must needs sail on the 
minute scheduled. 

The envelope should be addressed to the 
steamer in the following manner: 

Addressing Miss Gertrude Downe, 

the On Board: S. S. Tenadores, 

Envelope United Fruit Company, 

Pier — East River, 
New York City. 
My dear Miss Dash, 
Note I am sending you these few lines wishing you 
the jolliest of good times on your travels, and a 
safe and happy return. 

Bon voyage, 

Sincerely yours, 

Charles M. Deacon. 

[ 114 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Dear Mabel, 

So you are off for foreign shores. I wish I 
might be with you to enjoy all the good times 
I know are in store for you. 

With best wishes for a bon voyage and a 
safe return, I am 

Affectionately yours, 

Edith. 



My dear Helen, 

I am sending you my thoughts, with these few 
flowers, to start you on your journey. May you 
have the jolliest of times. 

With all good wishes for a bon voyage, I am, 
Warmly yours, 

Mary V. Blake. 



What is more delightful after months of The 

traveling than to receive a letter of welcome by „ r tt f r °* 

rV eicowie 
the pilot boat upon our return. How eagerly 

we watch for its approach, as leaning over the 
railing, we see the pilot climb nimbly up the 
wobbly rope ladder on to the deck. He is our 
first real contact with home — a far more 
tangible evidence than the familiar coast line 
we have been gazing at during the past day. 
Upon opening the mail-bag, your letter should 
be there among the others, if properly ad- 
dressed, as 

[ ii5 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Miss Gertrude Downe, 

At Quarantine, 

S. S. Zacapa, 
United Fruit Company, 

New York Harbor, 

New York. 

This letter must also be sent in ample time, 
to insure its reaching the boat. So you must 
find out through the steamship office direct, if 
possible, when the vessel is due, rather than get 
the information through other channels. 

Dear Gertrude, 
Letter Welcome to our shores again! It is good to 
know that when this reaches you that you will 
be but a stone's throw from us. 

I am most anxious to see you and hear of all 
your interesting experiences. 

Let me hear from you the first minute you 
can give me. 

With fond love, I am, 

Always affectionately yours, 
Emilie Glover. 

My dear Miss Dash, 

I wish I had a pilot's license, then I could 
come to greet you in person. But since, alas, 
I am not qualified in such seamanship, I must 
content myself with expressing on paper my 
pleasure at your safe return. 

[ 116 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Hoping to have the opportunity of seeing 
you very soon, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 

Abner C. Gruene. 

The letter written by the head of the house Letter to 
to the serving class should always be expressed bervmg 
in the third person. This applies also to petty 
tradesmen. If, on the other hand, the servant 
has been in the family a number of years, it 
would be more considerate to address her as 
"My dear Mary" or "My dear Sands," and 
sign the note with the initial instead of the 
Christian name, as M. S. Dash rather than 
Mary S. Dash. 

In many households the English custom of 
calling all servants by their last name is used, 
whether male or female. So Mary Jones would 
be known merely as "Jones"; the same applies 
to the men servants. 

Mrs. John Dash would like Ellen Smith to Formal 
come to see her on Tuesday, January y, at half Note 
past ten o'clock, with regard to the position of 
lady's maid. 

Mrs. John Dash wishes the New England Ice 
Company to leave fifty pounds of ice daily, begin- 
ning to-morrow, the fifteenth; this order to continue 
until further notice. 

[ 117 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My dear Jane, 
Informal We expect to return to town on Tuesday 
afternoon and will bring four guests to stay over 
the week-end, so please market accordingly. 

Also have Cramer meet us at the station at 
four-fifteen with the limousine. 

Yours very truly, 

M. S. Dash. 

My dear Sands, 

Kindly see that the house is in readiness to 
receive us on Tuesday next. We intend to re- 
turn on the six-ten train from Jersey City. 

Have Cramer go down to the station on Fri- 
day with the motor-truck, as I have sent up 
some furniture, as per list enclosed; also see that 
the Packard is in good condition as we expect 
to do much motoring upon our return. 

Please be at the station with the Dodge car, 
and tell Ellen to have a light supper for six, as 
we are bringing two guests with us. 

Yours very truly, 

J. F. Closser. 

The Letter This is given, if so requested, by the head of 

of Recom- t he house to the servant or employee upon 

mendation i • t^ • u *.• • ^i. 

leaving. It were wise to be cautious in the 

wording of this letter, for, in writing too plainly 
derogatory statements as to the nature of the 
employee, a suit can be brought for defamation 
of character. A good point to bear in mind -is, — 
[ 118 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

if we are unable to say anything good, say 
nothing. We must try not to let our personal 
feelings blind us to other qualities that might 
offset the poor ones referred to, and thus prevent 
an honest worker from obtaining employment. 

This is to certify that Mary Parsons has been For 
in my employ as chambermaid and waitress Excellent 
eighteen months. During that time I found Recom- ^ 
her most willing, honest and trustworthy. I mendation 
am very glad to recommend her highly. 

E. C. Castaigne. 
(Mrs. Geraud F. Castaigne.) 

This is to certify that John Crumpet has 
been employed by me as chauffeur for the past 
two years. I have found him a careful driver, 
expert mechanician, honest and sober. 

J. B. Marding. 

If, on the other hand, the servant or employee 
has been unsatisfactory, it would be footless 
to give him or her a letter, since, if his short- 
comings were^ stated, he would not be apt to 
use it. Nor should we perjure ourselves, and 
thus throw an unprincipled person upon an 
unsuspecting employer. Faint praise is less 
than no praise. If the servant has some fair 
quality, mention it in the letter of recommenda- 
tion; if he has not even that, it would be better 

[ 119 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

to refuse to write at all. If further recom- 
mendation is asked by the employer-elect, it 
is then time enough to tell facts, but we must be 
sure they are facts and not surmises, in all fair- 
ness. If the servant has been anything but 
trustworthy, it would be better to state this, 
when asked, at the same time remembering 
always to be careful that what we say is ab- 
solutely true. 

If the written recommendation which the 
servant or employee takes with him in seeking 
another position is followed up, the prospective 
employer telephones or writes for further in- 
formation or confirmation to the ex-employer 
somewhat in this fashion: 

Mrs. J. B. Dash, 

3067 Grand Avenue, 

Memphis, Tenn. 

Dear Madam: 
Letter Kindly forgive my intrusion, but I am about 
for In- to engage as second man, James Monohan, 
formation lately in your employ. I should be very grate- 
ful if you would let me have any informa- 
tion you can regarding his character and ability, 
and be assured that I shall treat the matter 
confidentially. 

Yours very truly, 

M. T. Mayne. 
(Mrs. Henry H. Mayne.) 

[ 120 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Mrs. Henry H. Mayne, 
60 Trevort Street, 

Utica, N. Y. 

Dear Madam: 

In reply to your communication of the 6th Answer 
inst., with regard to James Monohan, I beg to 
say, that while I found him honest and clean, I 
am sorry to report that he was not always sober, 
and therefore not very trustworthy at those 
times. He has promised to stop drinking, and 
if he does, I feel sure that he will make a very 
good servant. 

Yours truly, 

E. H. Dash. 



or: 

Mrs. Henry H. Mayne, 

60 Trevort Street, 

Utica, N. Y. 

Dear Madam: 

In reply to yours of the 6th inst., I beg to 
say that I found James Monohan to be a most 
trustworthy man. He is a little slow and hard 
of hearing, but, I am sure, you will find him 
satisfactory in every other respect, as second 
man. 

Trusting that this information is satisfac- 
tory, I remain, 

Yours truly, 

E. H. Dash. 

[ 121 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



Asking 
for In- 
formation 
Office 
Work 



Mr. H. K. Rowe, 

608 Roday Place, 

Cleveland, Ohio. 
Dear Sir: 

May I beg a moment of your time to tell me 
candidly all you know about Mr. Howard Post. 
I am about to engage him as clerk and would be 
very grateful for any information regarding his 
character and ability. 

The position is a responsible one, and, there- 
fore, I am desirous of having a man in whom I 
can place confidence. 

Regretting to have to trouble you, I am, 

Yours very truly, 

H. E. House. 



Mr. H. E. House, 

Crayville Building Co., 
Seattle, Wash. 
Dear Sir: 
Recom- In reply to your note of inquiry dated August 
mendation II, it gives me great pleasure to say, re- 
garding Mr. Howard Post, that, during the 
past six years in which he was employed 
by us, we found him to be in every respect 
worthy of our fullest confidence, and feel sure 
you need have no hesitancy in engaging him. 

Were it not for reorganization in our office, we 
would have been glad to retain him. 

Yours truly, 
H. K. Rowe, 

President. 

[ 122 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Mr. H. E. House, 

Crayville Building Co., 

Seattle, Wash. 

Dear Sir: 

I have your letter of August II. Unfor- Derogatory 
tunately, I am unable to say very much regard- 
ing Mr. Howard Post. While in our employ 
his unpunctuality and almost habitual inertia 
made him very undesirable as clerk. 

Yours truly, 
H. K. Rowe, 

President, 
or: 

Mr. H. E. House, 

Crayville Building Co., 

Seattle, Wash. 

Dear Sir: 

I would prefer to say but little regarding 
Howard Post. It is true that he was employed 
by us for over a year as clerk. He has many 
good qualities, but few that I found compatible 
with good clerkship. 

Regretting I am unable to furnish you with 
a better report, I remain, 

Yours truly, 

H. K. Rowe, 

President. 

It is decidedly not "good form" to ask for a The Letter 

letter, of introduction; this should come un- of Intro- 
solicited through a kind friend who knows uc l0n 
[ 123 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

your need. This note should be written in 
social form, enclosed in an envelope addressed 
to person to whom the introduction is made, 
— not to the one introduced, and left unsealed. 
It should be cordial in tone. 



My dear Mrs. Dash, 

This will introduce to you Miss Mabel 
Coventer of Trenton, New Jersey, who intends 
staying in your delightful city during the 
winter months. 

I would be so appreciative of any attention 
you would kindly show her. I am sure you 
will find her charming. 

With warmest regards to you all, I remain, 
Most sincerely yours, 

Janet F. Rowe. 



My dear Travers, 

I wish to introduce the bearer of this note, 
Mr. James Duncan, who intends stopping in 
your city for some months. He is the man- 
ager of the Western Celluloid Company of Los 
Angeles. Knowing your interest in the firm, I 
feel that you should become acquainted. 

Appreciating any favor you will be able to 
show Mr. Duncan, I remain, with kind re- 
gards, 

Sincerely yours, 

Joseph Cathaway. 

[ 124 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

My dear Commissioner Walton, 

This note will introduce to you one of our 
ablest and most respected citizens, Mr. Thomas 
Eagers. 

Mr. Eagers has for a long time been greatly 
interested in shipping problems, both in this 
country and abroad, and has made a wide 
study of conditions. He has much informa- 
tion of value, culled from his long sojourn 
in the Orient, as representative for the Ohio 
and Western Transportation and Import Com- 
pany. 

• I am sure you will be interested in each other, 
and am glad to be the means of thus bringing 
you together. 

The trout are plentiful in our streams and 
I shall be glad to get word that you will come 
out again to us and have a try at them. 

With cordial greetings to Mrs. Walton, 
I am, 

Yours sincerely, 

Ebner Harrison. 



The letter of introduction may be delivered 
personally, or mailed enclosed in another en- 
velope, with card inside. Then the recipient 
will, or should, call at the earliest opportunity 
or acknowledge the letter. If he is a member 
of some club, he might put you up there, besides 
showing other courtesies. 

[ 125 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Visiting- Often the visiting card with "Introducing 
card for Miss Blank" written at the top, is quite cor- 
. " rect for a person with whom we are but 
slightly acquainted. This is more usual in 
business than in social roles. The introduc- 
tory card is presented in person. 
Begging The begging letter for charity, in order to be 
Letter for effective, must make its appeal strong. In 
y almost all big organizations for charitable pur- 
poses, the letters are typed or multigraphed 
on official letter-head paper. We are not con- 
cerned with such here. What we are interested 
to know is how to write a personal letter in 
such a cause. It is written like other social 
notes, — by hand on social paper, somewhat in 
the following manner: 

My dear Mrs. Grey, 

Knowing how very much interested you are 
in many worthy charities, I am writing this 
little appeal as a further call upon your 
bounty. 

We are endeavoring to raise fifty thousand 
dollars toward a summer home for small wage 
earners where, for three or four dollars a week, 
they may have nourishing food, good air and 
proper attention during their meagre vacation, 
thus helping build them up through the months 
to come. 

[ 126 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

We have been promised ten thousand dollars, 
if we are able to raise the other forty thousand 
within three months, and you can see how 
anxious we are to fulfil the terms of this gener- 
ous offer. 

Will you not help us by contributing, no 
matter how small the sum, toward our work? 

Hoping to hear from you favorably, I am, 
Yours very sincerely, 

Amelia G. Bounde. 

In sending letters like the above, it is far 
better to have some printed pamphlets telling 
in detail the nature and outline of the work, 
together (and this is very important) with a 
list of names of the committee or those in- 
terested. Names have much weight in such 
matters. 

My dear Mrs. Dash, 

We are asking our friends to help us raise 
fifty thousand dollars toward a summer home 
for small wage earners, and I have put your 
name at the head of my list, knowing your 
great interest in the working class. I do so 
hope that we may count on having a contribu- 
tion from you, no matter how small, to help 
us carry on this so much needed home to a 
happy completion. 

With kindest regards, I am, 

Cordially yours, 
Cecile F. Trevort. 

[ 127 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

My dear Mrs. Trevort, 
Affirmative I am enclosing herewith my check for fifty 
Reply dollars as my contribution toward your worthy 
work in raising funds for a summer home for 
small wage earners, and trust that you will 
meet with every success in getting the amount 
necessary. 

With all good wishes, I am, 

Cordially yours, 

Mary F. Dash. 

My dear Mrs. Trevort, 

You may put me down for two hundred and 
fifty dollars as my contribution toward your 
home for small wage earners. This sum I 
agree to pay by the first week in January of 
the coming year. 

Wishing you all success, I am, 

Yours very sincerely, 
Ethel V. Dowd. 

My dear Mrs. Trevort, 
Refusal I regret exceedingly that I am unable to help 
you in raising the sum necessary for the home 
for small wage earners. Unfortunately, there 
have been so many demands upon my purse at 
this time, that I feel I must confine all my 
efforts to the charities in which I have a per- 
sonal interest. 

Regretting my inability to help, I remain, 
Yours sincerely, 

Katherine Sweete. 

[ 128 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

My dear Mrs. Trevort, 

I am so sorry, but heavy demands upon my 
purse preclude my adding any further charity 
to my already long list. 

Wishing you all success in your work, be- 
lieve me, 

Sincerely yours, 

Martha B. Greene. 

At a public function or charity, a list of pa- To Act as 
trons or patronesses is a very necessary factor Patron or 
toward making it a success. a roness 

The patroness is generally chosen, first, for 
the weight and importance her name lends, 
and secondly, because he or she is expected, by 
accepting to act in this capacity, to subscribe 
largely, in any event, taking not less than ten 
dollars' worth of tickets for the performance. 

The committee on entertainment, or chair- 
man, sends an engraved invitation or personal 
letter asking for this privilege. The note would 
read somewhat as follows : 

Mrs. Dudley Stagg, 

Mt. Kisco, New York. 

My dear Mrs. Stagg, 

We are giving a concert for the benefit of 
the Blind Babies' Association which will be 
held on Tuesday evening, March the sixth, at 
the Imperial, and would very greatly appre- 

[ 129 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

ciate being allowed to use your name as 
patroness. 

I am enclosing five tickets which I hope you 
will be able to use. 

Trusting to hear from you favorably, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 
Edith G. Traut, 

Chairman. 

Kindly send check to Mrs. G. Daigne, 652 
West 76th Street, and make it payable to her 
order. 

Frank R. Gregory, Esq., 
120 Broadway, 

New York. 

My dear Mr. Gregory, 

We are giving a special performance of 
"The Gods Provide " for the benefit of the 
widows and children of miners, to be held at 
the Criterion on Tuesday afternoon, May the 
fourth, at three o'clock. Will you kindly allow 
us to use your name as patron on this occasion? 

I am enclosing six tickets which I hope you 
will be able to use. 

All checks are to be made to the order of 
Graham F. Lightfoote, Treasurer, and sent to me. 

Trusting you will grant us the privilege of 
having you on our list, I am, 

Sincerely yours, 

Marion B. Cross. 
(Mrs. Francis R. Cross.) 

[ 130 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Mrs. C. V. Traut, 

50 Midvale Terrace, 

Mt. Kisco, New York. 

My dear Mrs. Traut, 

I beg herewith to enclose my check for ten Acceptance 
dollars in payment for the five tickets sent for 
your benefit for the Blind Babies' Association. 
I shall be very glad to have you use my name 
as patroness at that time. 

Wishing you all success, I am, 

Yours very truly, 

Muriel B. Stagg. 

Mrs. S. F. Weekes, 
York Turning, 

Poughkeepsie, N. Y. 

My dear Mrs. Weekes, 

It is with much pleasure that I lend my name 
as patron at your special performance for the 
widows and children of miners and enclose 
my check for fifty dollars herewith for a box. 

With sincere good wishes for your success, 
I am, 

Yours very truly, 

Thomas E. Maderon. 

Mrs. S. F. Weekes, 
York Turning, 

Poughkeepsie, N. Y. 

My dear Mrs. Weekes, 

In response to your note asking me to act as 
patroness at the benefit performance on Tues- 

[ 131 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

day, March the fourth, I beg to say that I shall 
be very glad to do so, provided it does not en- 
tail other responsibility than purchasing two 
tickets, for which I enclose my check. 
Yours very truly, 

Judith F. Hopkins. 

Mrs. S. F. Weekes, 
York Turning, 

Poughkeepsie, N. Y. 

My dear Mrs. Weekes, 
Refusal In reply to your note of the thirteenth in- 
stant, asking me to act as patroness at the bene- 
fit for the widows and children of miners, I beg 
to say that I prefer not to give my name, but 
enclose my check for five dollars, as a small 
donation toward your work. 

Thanking you for the courtesy extended, I am, 

Yours truly, 

Evelyn F. Grost. 

My dear Mrs. Weekes, 

I regret I am unable to accept your kind in- 
vitation to act as patroness for the benefit 
held on the sixth of March, and beg to return 
the five tickets sent. 

Thanking you for the courtesy of asking me, 

Yours truly, 

Margaret F. Doe. 

The Child's How great the task of setting a young child 
Letter down to write a duty letter. Fortunately, 

[ 132 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

there are few obligations imposed upon the little 
one, but the few are the thorns, not only for 
him, but for the parent who stands by to see 
that he says the right thing. 

A few very simple phrases are here set down 
to suggest an idea or so. They should not be 
used if the child has any idea of his own, but 
are placed in the following lines to help the 
little one whose pen or pencil is in no way a 
staff, but a stick, to be hurled to the farther- 
most corner of the room. 

Dear Auntie Mabel, 

Thank you very very much for the dolly. The Letter 
I think she is beautiful and I am very happy Of 
to have her come to stay with me. Thanks 

Mamma says I must be very careful of her, 
so that she will keep pretty a long time. I will 
be good to her as I love her very much. 

Please come soon and see me, 

Your loving little niece, 
Marjorie. 

Dear Uncle John, 

Thank you very much for the box of sol- 
diers. I like them best of all my birthday 
presents, and I am going to play war and fight 
my battleship against them. 

Please come soon and play with me, 
Your loving nephew, 

Teddie. 

[ 133 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Dear Grandma, 
On a I wish you many many happy returns of 
Birthday your birthday. I hope you are quite well and 
have a birthday cake with candles on it. 

Your loving grandchild, 

Edith. 

Dear Grandpa, 

I hope you are having a very happy birthday 
and that you have received lots of nice presents. 
I have sent a surprise to you, but you must not 
guess what it is until you get it. It is big and 
fat and soft, — but I won't tell you any more. 
Your loving grandson, 

Peter. 

French French is a language that lends itself to 

Mode of pr race Q f expression. It has six pretty ways of 
Address- . r r \/ t 

• an £ paying a compliment to our one. Many or us 

Closing are familiar with the language and write it 
Letters fluently, but pause at the proper closing salu- 
tation to a letter. The body of the letter is 
easily written, but we often puzzle over just 
what words to use to express the right amount 
of warmth or cordiality. 
In Some make the mistake of addressing a per- 

Addressing son as i n English, using the pronoun. This is 
redundant, for Chere Madame or Cher Mon- 
sieur, etc., is sufficient. Never abbreviate 
Madame, Monsieur, Mademoiselle unless the 

[ 134 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

name is added. "Dear Sir" or "Dear Madam" 
has its equivalent in Monsieur or Madame. 

In mentioning a relative to one with whom 
an intimate acquaintance is not established, 
we generally write: Monsieur votre Oncle, 
Madame votre Mere, etc. Officers and other 
men of military, naval or state titles are ad- 
dressed as : Monsieur le Commandant, Monsieur 
le Commissionaire, Monsieur UAmiral, Mon- 
sieur le Maire, etc. 

There are many variations to express the Concluding 
same sentiment, as was said above. The word a Letter 
recevez implies a condescension unless it is 
followed by a very cordial phrase. Except 
to an inferior, it is better to use the word 
agreer. 

To begin with the most distant and formal Yours 
of endings : Truly 

Recevez Monsieur {Madame) V expression de 
mes sentiments distingue s. 

Recevez Monsieur (Madame) mes salutations. 

Recevez Monsieur (Madame) mes civilites. 

Recevez Monsieur (Madame) V assurance de 
ma haute consideration. 

Je vous prie d'etre assure de mes meilleurs sen- Yours 
timents. Very Truly 

Je vous prie d* agreer mes salutations empressees. 

Croyez a mes bons sentiments pour vous. 

[ 135 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Yours Soyez certaine de P assurance de mes meilleurs 
sincerely sentiments. 

Croyez a mes sentiments devoues. 
(Gentleman to lady) Veuillez, Madame, rece- 
voir V expression de tout mon respect. 

Lady in answer — Agreez, cher Monsieur, 
V expression de mes sentiments d'amitie. 

Daignez agreer, Madame, mes meilleurs sou- 
venirs et mes vceux les plus sinceres pour votre 
succes. 
Yours Very Recevez, cher Monsieur, de ma part une cor- 
Sincerely di a l e poignee de main, or une bonne poignee de 

i ours yytatn. 
Cordially ^ . 

Bien a vous. 

Tout cordialement a vous. 

Je suis de cceur, votre tout devoue. 

Je suis tout a vous. 

Chere Madame, je vous baise la main. 

Yours Recevez, chere Madame, avec mes remercie- 

Gratefully ments, F assurance de ma gratitude infi'nie. 

Je vous prie d? agreer mes salutations et mes 

remerciements. 

Yours Re- Recevez, Monsieur, P expression de mon profond 
spectfully res p ecU 

Yours Veuillez recevoir, Madame, mes homages respec- 
Faithfully tuex% 

Yours Affec- Veuillez recevoir, chere Suzanne, V expression 
Honately ^ ma pi us v i ve am itie m 

[ 136 ] 



MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS 

Je fembrasse affectueusement. 
Ton tout devoue. 

Je suis de coeur, voire tout devoue. 
Jean s'unit a moi pour f envoy er a tous ses 
bonnes amities. 



[ 137 ] 



CHAPTER VIII 
MODE OF ADDRESS 

For [T^ORMS for addressing envelopes are gov- 
Women \j erned by a few accepted rules. For in- 
stance, — a married woman is addressed by her 
husband's name, even after his death, except 
where two women in the family have the same 
name. As, for example, a mother and daughter- 
in-law. The son has the same name as his 
father with Jr. added. At the father's death 
he drops the Jr., and so both married women 
Two have the same name, which often is very awk- 

. Women ward. If the widow wishes, she, in such a case, 
with Same i 1 i • i • i r 

N ame may take her baptismal name to avoid contu- 
sion, so, where she was formerly known as 
"Mrs. Henry Dash" she may now sign herself 
"Mrs. Grace Dash." 
Divorced With the divorced woman it is otherwise. 
Woman Unless the courts allow her the privilege of 
using her maiden name again, should she desire 
to do so, she takes her baptismal name. Prior 
to her divorce she was known as "Mrs. James 
Tooker Blaine," after, as "Mrs. Blanche Garrick 
(her maiden name) Blaine." Her status is then 
tacitly established and thus she avoids any un- 

[ 138 ] 



MODE OF ADDRESS 

pleasantness or confusion if her ex-husband 
should marry again and there would be two 
"Mrs. James Tooker Blaines." 

In writing to a stranger or in a business letter, Business 
the woman always signs her name to the letter ^i na ture 
thus: 

Christian name Maiden name Married name 
Margaret Meadows Johnson 

or her initials to the Christian and maiden name, 
always writing her married name in full. Under 
this signature she may add in brackets the 
name by which she is addressed as: 

Margaret Meadows Johnson 
or 

M. M. Johnson 

(Mrs. John W. Johnson) 

She must never use as part of the signature the 
prefix "Mrs." or "Mr." It is the height of bad 
form. In all social correspondence the woman 
always uses her full name, never just the initials. 

A woman never uses her husband's official Husband's 
title as, "Mrs. Dr. James" or "Mrs. Justice Official 
Smith," no matter what his rank may be. She 
has merely the right to "Mrs. Henry Smith" or 
"Mrs. George James." Even though the hus- 
band happens to be the highest executive of 
state, this form holds. 

[ 139 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

Title for If she has gained a title of her own she may, 
" l J e of course, use it. If, for instance, she is a 
physician, she would use her name thus, "Dr. 
Mary Stevens." In this instance she would 
not use her husband's Christian name. 
Unmarried In writing a business letter the unmarried 
Women woman, where she is not known, may put 
"Miss" in brackets before her signature, lest 
she be addressed as "Mrs.," as "(Miss) Eleanor 
Towne." 
Men In England it is the custom always to use 
Esq., or less frequently " Esqr." for all social 
correspondence, or to professional men, instead 
of "Mr." 

This custom is followed to a great extent in 
America. 

Social notes should be addressed: 
John Growton, Esq. 

Business notes should be addressed: 
Mr. John Growton 

Tradesmen notes should be addressed: 
John Growton 

Jr. and Sr. Some believe that if the name has Jr. or Sr. 
attached, Mr. or Esq. need not be used. Logi- 
cally, this does not hold, for either Sr. or Jr. 
is part of the signature and can hardly be 

[ 140 ] 



MODE OF ADDRESS 

considered a title. Therefore James Duncan, 
Jr., Esq., or Mr. James Duncan, Jr., is really 
the more correct form. In many cases Sr. is 
omitted, since in its omission lies the fact of 
senior being understood. Jr., however, is 
always used until the death of the senior of the 
same name. 

Titles of physicians, professors, clergy, titles Official 
by courtesy, and of those holding public office Titles 
are generally abbreviated on the envelope 
and at the heading of a letter, except when 
extremely formal. Esq. or Mr. is never used 
in connection with any titles whatsoever in the 
above cases. 

But where one addresses "My dear Doctor" 
or "My dear Professor," then the title is written 
in full. This form is not affected in formal notes, 
as it is more courteous to write title and name 
as, "My dear Doctor James" or "My dear 
Professor Duncan." In less formal notes these 
titles, when the name is added, may be abbre- 
viated, but never in formal invitations. 

All officers above the grade of lieutenant Officers of 

should be addressed by their titles and rank as, the Army 

and Navy 

General Henry F. Wood 

Adjutant General 

United States Army 

t hi i 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 

and should receive the written salutation in 
formal communications, "Sir;" in informal, 
"Dear General Wood." The word "General" 
should not be abbreviated. 

War Office James F. Pointer, Esq., 

General in Command of 
The Army of the United States 
or: 

James F. Pointer 
The Commanding Officer 
2Qth Infantry 

It is a general rule in the Army and Navy 
that envelopes addressed to officers of both 
services should be written with their proper title. 
A lieutenant is generally: 

Mr. J. G. Smith 

Lieutenant nth Regiment 
United States Infantry 

He is spoken of as Mister, — "My dear Mr. ." 

A Commander in the Navy is sometimes 
called by courtesy, "Captain," although the 
envelope is addressed, "Commander." 
Foreign An Ambassador is addressed formally as 
Legation "His Excellency" or "The Hon. Mr. Greene." 

The Hon. Rufus Greene 
Ambassador to Finland 

[ 142 ] 



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[ 143 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 






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I have honor to 
remain, my dear 
Archbishop 


I have honor to 
remain, my dear 
Lord Bishop, 
faithfully yours 


I have the honor to 
remain your humble 
servant 


I have the honor to 
remain your humble 
servant 


I have the honor to 
remain your humble 
servant 


I have the honor to 

remain your 

obedient servant, 

or 
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(sincerely) yours 


2 ►* 
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I remain my Lord 
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I have honor to 
remain your 
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servant 


I have the honor to 
remain your humble 
servant 


I have the honor to 
remain your humble 
servant 


I have the honor to 
remain your humble 
servant 


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remain your 

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or 
I remain respectfully 

(sincerely) yours 


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Your Eminence 

or 
Dear Cardinal 

Newton 


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My Lord Archbishop, 
May it please Your 
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The Most Reverend, 
His Grace the 
Archbishop of York 


To the Right Reverend, 
the Lord Bishop of 
Kent 


The Most Reverend 
John G. McCaular, 
Archbishop of 

Newgate 


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To the Right Reverend, 
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Edward F. Conroy, 
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Archbishop 
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Dear Doctor or Mr. 

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Roman Catholic 
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Believe me, Dear 
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I have the honor to 
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most obedient 
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My Lord (Madam), 
May it please your 
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To His (Her) Most 
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King George 
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To His (Her) Royal 
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To His (Her) Grace, 
the Duke of 
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Duchess of 
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To Her Grace, the 
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[ 145 ] 



THE SOCIAL LETTER 



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Believe me Lord 
(Lady) Fife, very 
sincerely yours 


t— 1 M 

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Believe me, My dear 
Lord (Lady) Grey, 
faithfully yours 


Believe me, dear Lady 
Janet, very 
faithfully yours 


2 < 

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k) o 


Believe me, Lord 
(Lady) Fife, very 
sincerely yours 


U* o 

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I have the honor to 
remain your 
Lordship's 
(Ladyship's) 
obedient servant 


I have the honor to 
remain your 
Lordship's 
(Ladyship's) 
obedient servant 


Ij 

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c3 
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My dear Lord James 

Grey, 
Dear Lady James 

Grey 


a 
a 

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a 
P 


si 

P o 

CO 


My Lord Marquis 
fMadam 




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a 


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To the Marquis of 

Fife, To the 
Marchioness of Fife 

or 
To the Most Noble 

Marquis of Fife, 
To the Most Noble 

Marchioness of Fife 


To the Dowager, 

Marchioness of Fife, 
To Mary, 

Marchioness of 
•Fife 


To the Right 

Honorable, the Lord 

James Grey, 
To the Right 

Honorable, the Lady 

James Grey 


Right Hon. the Lady 
Janet Gregory 
(Informal) 

To the Lady Janet 
Gregory 


a 


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a 

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a 


Dowager 
Marchioness 


Younger son and 
wife of a Duke 
or Marquis 


Daughter of Duke, 
Marchioness or 
Earl 



[ 146 ] 



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Believe me, dear Mr. 
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sincerely yours 


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